Witty/Funny/ Great Player nicknames

[pafcprogs]

Plymouth fan in peace

Whilst on holiday and bored I started looking at player nicknames ...don'r ask me why, there was a reason...

I am now on a mission to find the funniest wittiest and most apt nicknames current and historic...a pair of pre away Villa centre half nicknamed Death and Glory...yes please...

Sticks? Split Pin? tanglefoot?....I should coco

So I would be grateful for any Bolton ones you care to share.....

Best of luck for the rest of the season....

Peter

[Lost Leopard Spot]

We had one called Whiff Whaff. (Actually we didn't. If only we knew then what we know now).

...and of course, presently, we've got Goal Machine, that's quite funny

...and in the not too distant past, we nearly became the only professional team to put out an entire side composed of the same surname. We were a mere eight off, but were having difficulty with nicknames already

[dave the minion]

not as funny as Washing Machine...

[pafcprogs]

Washing Machine?

Do tell?

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Washing Machine?

Do tell?

Don't worry about it, that's a Blades thing, nothing to do with us. Here he's purely the Goal Machine, honestly. (can somebody put some fxckin powder in that thing, and take it off spin cycle?)

[TANGODANCER]

Well, without thinkin too hard (too late in the day) we did have a Chopper (Roy Hartle for those that can't remember), a "Moose" and....zzzzzzz

[Dave Sutton's barnet]

Washing Machine?

Do tell?

"Gary Madine / Goal Machine" (to the Tom Hark tune) was quickly corrupted, during his days of struggle, into "Gary Madine / Washing Machine".

[pafcprogs]

Thanks...oh for one of those...we were linked with him on loan a couple of years back ....

[pafcprogs]

Moose is original...there a lot of animal related ones but thats the first Moose I have seen...who was he?

[Dave Sutton's barnet]

Moose is original...there a lot of animal related ones but thats the first Moose I have seen...who was he?

Mixu Paatelainen, our mid-90s Finnish import (albeit via Scotland). Big lad, in height and girth.

His contemporary colleague Owen Coyle was known as either Flipper (because he said he'd swim the Irish Sea to play for the Republic) or Beano (because he was gangly like Mr Bean, especially next to Moose).

Earlier in the 90s, our diminutive yet rather jug-eared midfielder Mark Patterson had the Gremlins-influenced nickname Gizmo. (Not the Mark Patterson that played for you at roughly the same time; our one rarely left Lancashire.)

[Bruce Rioja]

Moose is original...there a lot of animal related ones but thats the first Moose I have seen...who was he?

Mixu Paatelainen, our mid-90s Finnish import

Moose being technically incorrect as that's a north American term for what Eurasia call an Elk.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Moose is original...there a lot of animal related ones but thats the first Moose I have seen...who was he?

Mixu Paatelainen, our mid-90s Finnish import

Moose being technically incorrect as that's a north American term for what Eurasia call an Elk.

We had an Elk a.

[Dr Hotdog]

Back in the early 00s in the West Upper two old dears behind us used to call Per Frandsen "Peaches". Maybe becuase he often scored goals that would you described as a "Peach".

Keeping it Scandi, I recall our brief loanee Stig Tofting was casually referred to as "The Lawnmower." This works in two different ways because A) He was a tenacious little chappy who was highly likely to chop you down, be it legal or illegally and B) as a hard-working central midfielder he covers every blade of grass on the pitch.

Who was that "Wardrobe on Castors" we had recently? Surname matched the club's nickname didn't it? Liam something. Can't bring myself to tap it out. The shithouse.

[Bruce Rioja]

Moose is original...there a lot of animal related ones but thats the first Moose I have seen...who was he?

Mixu Paatelainen, our mid-90s Finnish import

Moose being technically incorrect as that's a north American term for what Eurasia call an Elk.

We had an Elk a.

Oh get in, Sir

[TANGODANCER]

Moose is original...there a lot of animal related ones but thats the first Moose I have seen...who was he?

We had a "Fish" too, except it wasn't a nickname but a real one....

[Bruce Rioja]

Who was that "Wardrobe on Castors" we had recently? Surname matched the club's nickname didn't it? Liam something. Can't bring myself to tap it out. The shithouse.

Haha. I pride myself on having been the originator of that particular sobriquet.

Wasn't Henrik Pedersen know as 'The Carpenter', or some such?

Fellow Dane, Michael Johansen was always known to me and my mates as Alan Ball.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Fellow Dane, Michael Johansen was always known to me and my mates as Alan Ball.

[boltonboris]

Nah, he was Smurf for sure!!

[Dave Sutton's barnet]

Wasn't Henrik Pedersen know as 'The Carpenter', or some such?

Aye. Pedersen's nickname was player-endowed - he got it back home after turning up to training in dungarees.

[Bruce Rioja]

Wasn't Henrik Pedersen know as 'The Carpenter', or some such?

Aye. Pedersen's nickname was player-endowed - he got it back home after turning up to training in dungarees.

Nowt to do with his mean bevelled edge then? You live and learn.