Matchday Tips

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Drink in the Man and Scythe in town, avoid anything other than Thatchers cloudy cider and try and sup about 6 pints before you leave.

Repeat the process again in Blue Boar, again order Thatchers (not the old dead hag, btw) and attempt at least 6 pints.

Order a taxi to the Reebok sometime after 2.30pm (the roads are clearer then) and there will be thousands of tickets going spare, sit in the ESL underneath the scoreboard to appreciate our fine young scrotes in full voice.

After the match sink at least 6 pints in either Scotts or Harvesters before getting a taxi back to Bolton.

In Bolton go to The Griffin, the Balmoral and McAuley's to see the delightfully cosmopolitain lads & lasses who frequent those fine establishments.

Enjoy - but don't forget to down at least 12 pints before the match starts - as the place is in the middle of nowhere and is a soulless & depressing concrete bowl.

This is fantastic advice. I like the sound of Scotts. Can you buy whiskey in there?

I really can't wait for tomorrow. My first proper drunken english football match. I saw a guy punching a horse after a game last weekend? Does that usually happen after games? My horse punching skills are a bit rusty.


What happens if the Bolton Wanderereres win? Do we get to hug the horses?

Also, regarding the debate I have inadvertently started re Americans travelling the globe, let me say this:

It's true that many of us Yanks don't understand there is a world outside the USA. We just think the rest of the world is a big desert full of countries like Afghanistan, Iraq and Ireland.

But I am lucky enough to have visited a lot of countries, not 50 like the guy here who was born in 1994, but I would say at least 10 (if you count Canada and Mexico as countries, which I don't).

I have been to Wales and Scotland too, but are they part of England or what? What about the UK, what's that? And GB? What's the deal with that? Also, I like the look of the Jessica Ennis chick from the Olympic games. But does she play for GB or UK or just England?

Sorry for all these questions. I want to blend in with the crowd tomorrow and would hate to make an embarrassing faux pas.

Have you ever been to Stellaland?

[Annoyed Grunt]

Shittest. Thread. Ever.

[superkev]

Have you ever been to Stellaland?

Nope, but I reckon young Dan"I was born in 1994" has been

Tell me more of this Stellaland, it sounds magical.

[bwfcdan94]

My sister has just came in and informed me I have been to 53 countries and she has done 52. She also tells me my dad has done 101. Will bring list to Cardiff.

[jaffka]

My sister has just came in and informed me I have been to 53 countries and she has done 52. She also tells me my dad has done 101. Will bring list to Cardiff.

is your sister older or younger than you?

[superkev]

My sister has just came in and informed me I have been to 53 countries and she has done 52. She also tells me my dad has done 101. Will bring list to Cardiff.

is your sister older or younger than you?

I would also like to know more about 1994s sister. Pictures if possible.

[jaffka]

My sister has just came in and informed me I have been to 53 countries and she has done 52. She also tells me my dad has done 101. Will bring list to Cardiff.

is your sister older or younger than you?

I would also like to know more about 1994s sister. Pictures if possible.

you are batman!

[superkev]

Shittest. Thread. Ever.

Mr Grunt, you sir are very difficult. I did not start this thread to entertain you. I challenge you to a list of countries fight. Come on then. I'll go first.

Sweden
Italy
Rome
Bolton
England
Bolton again
Ireland
America
The Ocean

[Annoyed Grunt]

Shittest. Thread. Ever.

Mr Grunt, you sir are very difficult. I did not start this thread to entertain you. I challenge you to a list of countries fight. Come on then. I'll go first.

Sweden
Italy
Rome
Bolton
England
Bolton again
Ireland
America
The Ocean

[jaffka]

Liverpool, that is a seperate country. And Newcastle as well, the geordie t*@ts.

[superkev]

Liverpool, that is a seperate country. And Newcastle as well, the geordie t*@ts.

Newcastle! That's where the horse punch man comes from!

[jaffka]

Liverpool, that is a seperate country. And Newcastle as well, the geordie t*@ts.

Newcastle! That's where the horse punch man comes from!

That geordie dancer as well.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PS7onFbd-1w" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[bwfcdan94]

Will print a official list with months tomorrow.

[bwfcdan94]

Ok, I'm off to bed. But I still have some serious questions unanswered;

Is there really not one good pub in the entire Bolton Wanderers Metropolitan area?

If not, what are my options for drinking cans of Stella?

Have you got a drink problem? Just one more question, why the interest in Bolton?

No drinking problem at all, I love it....why would there be a problem?

I am interested in Bolton because I found out there is a match on this weekend and you guys are hoping to get into the Premier League. I have nothing else to do this weekend, that's why I started this thread.

And like most threads on this website it detracted from it's original topic and I as usual was involved in derailing it along with some usual suspects that are very good at antagonizing me.

[superkev]

Ok back on topic. What is the food like in Bolton. Can you eat at "half-time"? What's on the menu?

[Lord Kangana]

\We can eat at half time, full time, and any time we want.

Thats the shitter about free will.

[superkev]

We eat when we want, we eat when we want, we're Bolton Wanderereres, we eat when we want.

So I'm just outside the Reebok guys, seems a bit quiet. What time does the tailgating party start?

[Abdoulaye's Twin]

We eat when we want, we eat when we want, we're Bolton Wanderereres, we eat when we want.

So I'm just outside the Reebok guys, seems a bit quiet. What time does the tailgating party start?

You're not in the US of A

[bwfcdan94]

We eat when we want, we eat when we want, we're Bolton Wanderereres, we eat when we want.

So I'm just outside the Reebok guys, seems a bit quiet. What time does the tailgating party start?

I think your watch may be wrong, in answer to your question my sister is younger than me nut basically copied the lists from my dads diary for the three of us.

[Worthy4England]

We eat when we want, we eat when we want, we're Bolton Wanderereres, we eat when we want.

So I'm just outside the Reebok guys, seems a bit quiet. What time does the tailgating party start?

Head to Asda on Middlebrook. The White Lightning aisle is towrds the right. Grab a few bottles, we'll be there shortly.