Grumpy Old Man Thread.

InsaneApache · Post by **InsaneApache** » Sat May 10, 2008 3:42 pm

What really ticks you off? Here's a starter.

Mobile 'phones.

I hate the buggers. When I used to own one they always rang at the most inopportune moments. Like when I was negotiating a roundabout on the North Circular.

Then there is those bloody polyphonic ringtones. What's all that about? What's wrong with a simple bell sound? Another thing is the owners. Why oh why do they have to shout into the damn things? I don't want to hear what you're saying to 'Baz' or 'Shaz' or whatever twonk your connected to. I feel like grabbing them out of their hands, jump up and down on them (ala Basil Fawlty) and then handing them back to their owners. Bastards.

If that aint enough. they're not just 'phones anymore, are they? No they play music, videos, take pictures, tell the time and generally just irritate the hell out of me.

I'd take a leaf out of Nu-Labs book and ban 'em.

CrazyHorse · Post by **CrazyHorse** » Sat May 10, 2008 4:57 pm

I'd love to contribute to this thread - I'm grumpy and a man - but I'm still but a spring chicken so I'll leave the moaning to all you old fossils.

Prufrock · Post by **Prufrock** » Sat May 10, 2008 10:58 pm

people. i f*cking hate people!

General Mannerheim · Post by **General Mannerheim** » Sat May 10, 2008 11:22 pm

Think ive talked about it before, what i really hate is umbrellas, especially blokes and umbrellas - put your mac on you nonce!

also hate scallys, the black trackies, air max and hoody brigade! & what about the little fu ckers who play music through their phones loud speakers!!!!!

no wonder teenagers keep getting shot, it was me!

Soldier_Of_The_White_Army · Post by **Soldier_Of_The_White_Army** » Sun May 11, 2008 10:18 am

InsaneApache wrote:What really ticks you off? Here's a starter.

Mobile 'phones.

I hate the buggers. When I used to own one they always rang at the most inopportune moments. Like when I was negotiating a roundabout on the North Circular.

Then there is those bloody polyphonic ringtones. What's all that about? What's wrong with a simple bell sound? Another thing is the owners. Why oh why do they have to shout into the damn things? I don't want to hear what you're saying to 'Baz' or 'Shaz' or whatever twonk your connected to. I feel like grabbing them out of their hands, jump up and down on them (ala Basil Fawlty) and then handing them back to their owners. Bastards.

If that aint enough. they're not just 'phones anymore, are they? No they play music, videos, take pictures, tell the time and generally just irritate the hell out of me.

I'd take a leaf out of Nu-Labs book and ban 'em.

hisroyalgingerness · Post by **hisroyalgingerness** » Sun May 11, 2008 10:35 am

General Mannerheim wrote:Think ive talked about it before, what i really hate is umbrellas, especially blokes and umbrellas - put your mac on you nonce!

also hate scallys, the black trackies, air max and hoody brigade! & what about the little fu ckers who play music through their phones loud speakers!!!!!

no wonder teenagers keep getting shot, it was me!

stood next to a guy at T in the park couple of years back. i thought he was hammered, turned out he were just a bit weird. but tutned out he had a true phobia of umbrellas because twice the ends have caught him in his eyes

hisroyalgingerness · Post by **hisroyalgingerness** » Sun May 11, 2008 10:37 am

General Mannerheim wrote:Think ive talked about it before, what i really hate is umbrellas, especially blokes and umbrellas - put your mac on you nonce!

also hate scallys, the black trackies, air max and hoody brigade! & what about the little fu ckers who play music through their phones loud speakers!!!!!

no wonder teenagers keep getting shot, it was me!

oh and this really winds me up. put this in my top 10 peeves definitely. there's no need to inflict your music on anyone else, especially that shitty trance/dance/prance thing they play, which sounds tinny as fook through their little device

wovlad · Post by **wovlad** » Sun May 11, 2008 10:37 am

also hate scallys, the black trackies, air max and hoody brigade! & what about the little fu ckers who play music through their phones loud speakers!!!!!

no wonder teenagers keep getting shot, it was me!

Trouble is its usually schoolies who do it, so you can't give em a crack. Should make it a hanging offence, that stop it

Worthy4England · Post by **Worthy4England** » Sun May 11, 2008 11:17 am

I was a proper "grumpy old man" on Friday night. Stood outside my local having a smoke, when one of the guys I was with said "some yoof has just banged on your windows and legged it up the fields"

Wifie comes out of the house ranting and saying the kids were frightened. etc. So I figure that I better go sort it out. Get to their "encampment" there's about half a dozen of 'em about 17 to 18 years old, all half pi$$ed on Vodka wicked's and I end up eyeball to eyeball with the nobber who's belted on my windows. One old boy who's followed me out of the pub said he'd rang the police so I should leave it, so I wandered back to the roadside to a barrage of abuse and waited there for the cops to turn up.

In between times, said yoofs obviously decide they're going to have a proper go, and come wandering over, after ringing some more of their mates from the boozer down the road. Bit more to-ing and fro-ing, gobby bastard that banged on my windows drops his empty bottle so I waded in. Lots of break it up and pushing and shoving ensued when the footie team from our local who were having their end of season bash got wind of what was going on, along with some fellow Bolton fan mates of mine. Result about 60 people piled out and gave said nobbers a proper good hiding...

Police turn up about two hours later and were told be all and sundry that said yoofs must have got bored and gone home to bed.

A victory for local justice in my humble opinion. Expect that they'll think twice about banging on me windows again.

Grumpy Old Men 1 - Yoofs 0 (teeth)

mummywhycantieatcrayons · Post by **mummywhycantieatcrayons** » Sun May 11, 2008 11:24 am

Worthy4England wrote:A victory for local justice in my humble opinion. Expect that they'll think twice about banging on me windows again.

More likely that they'll think twice about what weapon they'll gain their revenge with.

hisroyalgingerness · Post by **hisroyalgingerness** » Sun May 11, 2008 11:25 am

its oreet when locals rally round like that. but when stuff happens in town centre, where i often get abused/intimidated when walking home from work or on buses and trains, other folk turn away shitscared to get involved

standard reasons for me getting shit on the way home tends to be for not having a ciggy or a lighter to share with my good neighbour

Worthy4England · Post by **Worthy4England** » Sun May 11, 2008 11:29 am

mummywhycantieatcrayons wrote:
Worthy4England wrote:A victory for local justice in my humble opinion. Expect that they'll think twice about banging on me windows again.

More likely that they'll think twice about what weapon they'll gain their revenge with.

Mr Baseball Bat didn't even make an appearance. They want to push it, they need reminding that some of us oldies were dragged up on the same "mean streets" that they think they're in charge of.

mummywhycantieatcrayons · Post by **mummywhycantieatcrayons** » Sun May 11, 2008 11:34 am

Worthy4England wrote:
mummywhycantieatcrayons wrote:
Worthy4England wrote:A victory for local justice in my humble opinion. Expect that they'll think twice about banging on me windows again.

More likely that they'll think twice about what weapon they'll gain their revenge with.
Mr Baseball Bat didn't even make an appearance. They want to push it, they need reminding that some of us oldies were dragged up on the same "mean streets" that they think they're in charge of.

That's just it though, there's plenty worse than baseball bats taken out onto the 'mean streets' these days, and enough of these vigilante stories have a pretty grim ending.

Anyway, I don't think it's the right way to deal with these things, but I can appreciate that there doesn't seem much option when the police are taking 2 hours to arrive.

Lord Kangana · Post by **Lord Kangana** » Sun May 11, 2008 11:40 am

hisroyalgingerness wrote:its oreet when locals rally round like that. but when stuff happens in town centre, where i often get abused/intimidated when walking home from work or on buses and trains, other folk turn away shitscared to get involved

standard reasons for me getting shit on the way home tends to be for not having a ciggy or a lighter to share with my good neighbour

Was in a bookies in Shepherds Bush a few years back with an my American flat-mate(actually checking out the Wanderers score!), and this yoof walked up to him and said "giz a cig". My mate had none, he was smokin mine, so says "I've got none". The lad got quite threatening, saying "I'll get me mates if you don't give us one".

My mate being abroad was getting quite scared, so to alleviate the situation I grabbed hold of said yoof and calmly said "Go get yer mates then, and yer brother and yer bloody uncles if you think it'll help, now f*ck off yer not having a cig" (the bravado was mostly trying to calm my mate down, you understand).

Anyway, he buggers off an nowt happens ....until a week later, he comes home a bit flushed and has been chased by said yoof, a few of his mates and (quite possibly his brothers and uncles!) for about 1/2 a mile. Sorry Tony, if you're reading this

I guess you can't win....

Worthy4England · Post by **Worthy4England** » Sun May 11, 2008 11:48 am

mummywhycantieatcrayons wrote:
Worthy4England wrote:
mummywhycantieatcrayons wrote:
Worthy4England wrote:A victory for local justice in my humble opinion. Expect that they'll think twice about banging on me windows again.

More likely that they'll think twice about what weapon they'll gain their revenge with.
Mr Baseball Bat didn't even make an appearance. They want to push it, they need reminding that some of us oldies were dragged up on the same "mean streets" that they think they're in charge of.
That's just it though, there's plenty worse than baseball bats taken out onto the 'mean streets' these days, and enough of these vigilante stories have a pretty grim ending.

Anyway, I don't think it's the right way to deal with these things, but I can appreciate that there doesn't seem much option when the police are taking 2 hours to arrive.

We did worse than baseball bats in my day too...This wasn't vigilanteism. We called the police, but by the time they arrived, they were way too late. I agree that preferably, I would have rather law enforcement officers had dealt with the situation. By the same token, I'm not running off either. Que sera....

FD · Post by FD » Sun May 11, 2008 11:51 am

"Text Talk"

Anyone who uses it should fecking die.

"R U CUMIN 2 PUB 2NITE? K M8 C U L8R!!"

Feels like my eyes are being raped.

Lord Kangana · Post by **Lord Kangana** » Sun May 11, 2008 11:53 am

FD wrote:"Text Talk"

Anyone who uses it should fecking die.

I think we can agree on that

Worthy4England · Post by **Worthy4England** » Sun May 11, 2008 12:11 pm

Lord Kangana wrote:
FD wrote:"Text Talk"

Anyone who uses it should fecking die.
I think we can agree on that

I could possibly forgive the first one

TANGODANCER · Post by **TANGODANCER** » Sun May 11, 2008 12:21 pm

There's always been gang warfare, people wanting dominance through bullying and the ridiculous code of so-called respect that exists amongst the young. Only real difference through eras is that the one-to-one method of the clowns wanting to be cock of the walk has disaapeared, replaced by "me and my seventeen mates will sort you out". Problem isn't with the police, it's the lack of parental control and police action the government has imposed on society. They've effectively tied the hands of parents and police and given the little bxxxards licence to kill without fear of punishment.

If you did anything out of line when we were kids the police kicked your arse and dragged you home where your dad kicked it again. The thought of anybody threatening or abusing older people would have been met by a communal good-hiding from most of the males in the area. It just didn't happen; more chance of the offenders getting a whack from some old lady's walking stick. Not a chapter from "All our yesterdays", just a fact. What good example can kids get from a shaven-headed tattooed thug of a dad who walks about with a bull-terrier on a lead. That's not just a stereotype, it's a reality.

Kids of fourteen today are totally dangerous in this gang culture that's so eveident on a million street corners in this country. Make then afraid of reprisals via punishment and they aren't brave at all, just a bunch of kids made cocky because they know they win come what may. Give them a clout, you get done for bullying, face up to them, and, as happened to Worthy, the mobiles start ringing and the mobs appear.

Everybody knows the problems, no-one does anything about them. If they do, why is it still happening daily? Ban the hoods and the scarves, dispense the gangs, come down like the wrath of God on the offenders and punish the parents who let them run riot, and sanity may reign one day. Someone once said, "The only people who can disperse twelve lads off a street corner are twelve dads". Just never happens though does it?

Little Green Man · Post by **Little Green Man** » Sun May 11, 2008 1:23 pm

There's some real scumbags out there. The guy a floor below me got robbed for the third time in less than three years on Friday. They hacked their way through two doors and nicked his iPod, camera and wedding ring.

So why wasn't he wearing his wedding ring? Because the guy upstairs bonked his wife less than six months after their honeymoon.

Scumbags abound. Resistance is futile.