Today I'm happy about......

[mrkint]

thanks, chaps.

A lot to work on, but thanks for your words and thoughts.

My balls are quite normal-sized.

[mrkint]

For those who said the sound was off on the last one - here's the previous one I did. Same set, better quality (audio and visual, that is)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ogs5wwbU ... e=youtu.be" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[Lost Leopard Spot]

For those who said the sound was off on the last one - here's the previous one I did. Same set, better quality (audio and visual, that is)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ogs5wwbU ... e=youtu.be" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

I'm thinking you can work a bacon roll joke in somewhere towards the end of the Greggs bit.

[mrkint]

firstly, it's called a bacon barm

secondly, in what sense? I'm all ears.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

firstly, it's called a bacon barm

secondly, in what sense? I'm all ears.

barm/roll I was thinking of your Lahndaners in the audience.
Errr, I'm not sure (I've never scriptwrit jokes before), but I can see some humour somewhere in there where the EDL blokes are praying towards Mecca and one of them's asking for a bacon barm, there's definitely room for a punchline... I just don't know what.

[TANGODANCER]

firstly, it's called a bacon barm

secondly, in what sense? I'm all ears.

barm/roll I was thinking of your Lahndaners in the audience.
Errr, I'm not sure (I've never scriptwrit jokes before), but I can see some humour somewhere in there where the EDL blokes are praying towards Mecca and one of them's asking for a bacon barm, there's definitely room for a punchline... I just don't know what.

The Ricky Gardner beer can barm.

[mrkint]

ah i see what you mean. Though I've tried a dinner/tea one before and it didn't really go down well. Plus idk, it feels like something that's been done before.

I'm working on something about people saying the north is friendlier than the south, which ends up in me re-enacting getting the sh*t kicked out of me on a night out (but narrating it to portray the attackers as trying to give me first aid), however I do wonder whether it would make people laugh or section me.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

ah i see what you mean. Though I've tried a dinner/tea one before and it didn't really go down well. Plus idk, it feels like something that's been done before.

I'm working on something about people saying the north is friendlier than the south, which ends up in me re-enacting getting the sh*t kicked out of me on a night out (but narrating it to portray the attackers as trying to give me first aid), however I do wonder whether it would make people laugh or section me.

Yeh, I don't suppose the bacon barm thing is very original.

[Bruce Rioja]

Talking of bacon barms, I've temporarily broken off from my fury so that I can piss my sides at these idiots that have bought 'micro pigs' for cute pets and have in actual fact bought normal piglets and now have a fully grown sow in the living room. I can just imagine the conversation on the sofa at dawning of the realisation. "Err, Marjorie love, this micro pig's getting a little big isn't it?"

[Montreal Wanderer]

For those who said the sound was off on the last one - here's the previous one I did. Same set, better quality (audio and visual, that is)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ogs5wwbU ... e=youtu.be" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

I could certainly hear that one - in fact the guy in the fruity shorts who introduced you blew me off my chair and all the cats have vanished. Anyway, good stuff and well done, although remember that one important aspect of public TIMING speaking is.

[mrkint]

thanks monty! what were you referring to with the timing thing? I'm an idiot, sorry.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

thanks monty! what were you referring to with the timing thing? I'm an idiot, sorry.

Well, not speaking for Monty, but if you review the footage, the timing on *hand showing position* "Town hall", *hand further back* "Greggs", *hand even further back* "errrr..." *pause* is superb.
Contrast and compare to where you introduce Bolton and its industries and you kind of fluff "racism" because you rush and the timing is off. If you'd paused, slightly, before saying it, it would have had greater impact and would be much funnier.
That sort of thing is possibly what Monty's on about. If not, I'll add it as feedback.

[bwfcdan94]

Was practising my bowling today (cricket) when I managed to get a full pitched leg cutter to move from outside leg stump to outside off (more like what you expect from a leg spinner).

[Montreal Wanderer]

thanks monty! what were you referring to with the timing thing? I'm an idiot, sorry.

Well, not speaking for Monty, but if you review the footage, the timing on *hand showing position* "Town hall", *hand further back* "Greggs", *hand even further back* "errrr..." *pause* is superb.
Contrast and compare to where you introduce Bolton and its industries and you kind of fluff "racism" because you rush and the timing is off. If you'd paused, slightly, before saying it, it would have had greater impact and would be much funnier.
That sort of thing is possibly what Monty's on about. If not, I'll add it as feedback.

True enough but I was giving you another joke - the secret of telling a joke is timing but if you insert it in the wrong place you highlight the poor timing.. Though Spotty is correct - speaking more slowly is key along with the pauses. We all rush when we are nervous. If you only have six minutes, tell one fewer joke. If the audience is slow to get a joke but suddenly do (as happened) give them a chance to stop laughing before going on. With experience you will get better and better - watch your youtube videos and check those of other comedians.

[bwfcdan94]

Its all about to end tomorrow the sky's are meant to produce hell on earth for Britain tomorrow however it will be heaven for me. Thunderstorms, loads of lightening, torrential rain and gale force wind to blow even Fat Frank over. Sun worshipers you have been warned!!!

[bobo the clown]

Gosh Monty. Is there anything you don't know ???? (eyelids fluttering in stunned admiration)

[Worthy4England]

Was practising my bowling today (cricket) when I managed to get a full pitched leg cutter to move from outside leg stump to outside off (more like what you expect from a leg spinner).

That's good, as long as you retain (roughly) the same pace as a normal delivery. If you've lobbed it up like a dork, they'll probably laugh heartily, before dispatching it full bung over mid-wicket.

[2399]

Happy I've decided to take my market dvds to market this Friday...if I'm not working!!!

It's only $5 to have a stall!!!

[TANGODANCER]

I'm happy I mowed the lawns...yesterday.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

I'm happy I mowed the lawns...yesterday.

Yes. I looked at mine this morning and could not believe the length. If my lawns were people they'd be hippies...