Things your nan says
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Things your nan says
Anyone listen to the Russell Brand show on Radio 2? I don’t want a debate on whether he’s a tw@t or not, but they do this feature where people write in with funny tales of what their nan has said, its pretty funny, usually something totally ignorant or stupid, but sometimes an easy mistake, like they had this one nan, who asked her grandson if they could call at a shop on the way home so she could pick up a packet of them durex, 'apparently they're very good'... when actually she meant 'Duracell' for her remote control! They call them Nan-ec-dotes!
So, whats the funniest Nanecdote you've heard you're nan, or any old person say?
So, whats the funniest Nanecdote you've heard you're nan, or any old person say?
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My Mum-in-Law (she's quite old and qualifies for Nan status as all my Grandparents died when I was very young) was watching the 'Freddie Mercury Tribute Concert' on TV some years ago and Mettallica were getting seriously down to ' Stone Cold Crazy' when she uttered the now famous (in our household, anyway) "oohh, I do like that Simply Red"
"You're Gemini, and I don't know which one I like the most!"
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My gran, bless her cotton socks is coming out with some right pearls at the moment. Mainly due to the cocktail of methadone and ketamin she's on for her cancer, however ones that really stick out fondly are.......
About the lottery. My mum said "I'd be happy winning half a million." my gran replied "Oh, I wouldn't be that greedy, £500k would suit me fine."
Also after a split from an ex, she told me "Don't worry, and keep your pecker up!".
Both I'll add before she started doing a Doherty
About the lottery. My mum said "I'd be happy winning half a million." my gran replied "Oh, I wouldn't be that greedy, £500k would suit me fine."
Also after a split from an ex, she told me "Don't worry, and keep your pecker up!".
Both I'll add before she started doing a Doherty
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General Mannerheim wrote:All round the dinner table when not my nan but my mum wanted to know what 'rimming' was! then beacuse everyone was biting their hands laughing, she got on the phone to my aunt, 'whats rimming? these buggers wont tell me, what is rimming?"
How the hell did the subject of rimming crop up whilst sat round the dinner table?
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House too near Blackburn?CrazyHorse wrote:General Mannerheim wrote:All round the dinner table when not my nan but my mum wanted to know what 'rimming' was! then beacuse everyone was biting their hands laughing, she got on the phone to my aunt, 'whats rimming? these buggers wont tell me, what is rimming?"
How the hell did the subject of rimming crop up whilst sat round the dinner table?
I had the same thing with "blow-job"......
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Maybe they were discussing who was to eat the 'Parson's Nose'?CrazyHorse wrote:General Mannerheim wrote:All round the dinner table when not my nan but my mum wanted to know what 'rimming' was! then beacuse everyone was biting their hands laughing, she got on the phone to my aunt, 'whats rimming? these buggers wont tell me, what is rimming?"
How the hell did the subject of rimming crop up whilst sat round the dinner table?
"You're Gemini, and I don't know which one I like the most!"
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Do you go into rimmers? I thought it was a bit more edgy than that.boltonboris wrote:When you go in?InsaneApache wrote:There's a sauna next to the 'gay' pub in Braford called Rimmers. Always raises a smile from me.
Here I stand foot in hand...talkin to my wall....I'm not quite right at all...am I?
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haha, not sure if this is even worse - she had been on facebook and my brothers status was 'rimming my mother' - he wasnt of course, his mate had changed it when he wasnt looking.CrazyHorse wrote:General Mannerheim wrote:All round the dinner table when not my nan but my mum wanted to know what 'rimming' was! then beacuse everyone was biting their hands laughing, she got on the phone to my aunt, 'whats rimming? these buggers wont tell me, what is rimming?"
How the hell did the subject of rimming crop up whilst sat round the dinner table?
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Apparently, my nan was looking for a new shower curtain rail, she asked one of the guys working in the store what they had. He replied, "all we've got is these poles," to which she replied "we've got enough of those in this country all ready" and promptly walked away....
Its even funnier because one of her best friends is a Polish woman who came over here after the war!
Its even funnier because one of her best friends is a Polish woman who came over here after the war!
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That might have been classed as humour rather than senility.Milky_Joe wrote:Apparently, my nan was looking for a new shower curtain rail, she asked one of the guys working in the store what they had. He replied, "all we've got is these poles," to which she replied "we've got enough of those in this country all ready" and promptly walked away....
Its even funnier because one of her best friends is a Polish woman who came over here after the war!
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