Whats the most trouble you have got into at school?

[Sponge]

I went to an all-boys school – endless testosterone-fuelled stupidity. "Muck-up day" after our graduation sticks in my mind. Bricked up the headmaster's door, drew a massive cock on the sports field in weed killer (I thought that was a bit far, myself), then – wearing balaclavas and carrying water balloons and fire extinguishers – went to a neighbouring girls' school and charged through the corridors soaking everyone in sight (including 150 girls sitting their GCSEs). The police were called and we all ended up at the station; to their credit, they saw the funny side and let us go without any sort of charge.

Was this recently? I remember playing cricket at Bury Grammar a few years ago and there being a huge dick on the outfield. Made fielding positions interesting.

2005. But I went to school in south London...

[bobo the clown]

I never got into trouble at Thorners. I was a good boy ...

... but then again, I did end up Deputy Head Boy !!

now I absolutely know you're a wanker!!! Arse kisser!

Beat me to it. Proper Do-gooder!

Some are born to lead, just accept it. Life will be a lot easier for us all then.

[Worthy4England]

I never got into trouble at Thorners. I was a good boy ...

... but then again, I did end up Deputy Head Boy !!

now I absolutely know you're a wanker!!! Arse kisser!

Beat me to it. Proper Do-gooder!

Some are born to lead, just accept it. Life will be a lot easier for us all then.

Look, we just work round irrelevant levels of management.

[Harry Genshaw]

Didn't do anything too bad and was never caned but got slapped hard around the face twice by different teachers. One, from a gym teacher (a right w**ker) was pretty much a punch and left me bruised for a few days afterwards - and all for messing about while putting a vaulting horse thing away.

Sixth form didn't go as well and I was finally told not to come back after getting leathered on trips to London & Alton Towers.

[Bruce Rioja]

As a 2nd year (that's the one in which you're 12 to 13, pups ) I was in WH Smith in town and noticed that they had the answer book to the maths textbook that we were using, so I nicked it. For the next few weeks I got splendid marks for getting all the answers correct but was marked down for not showing my working out. Anyway, the game was up when a misprint in the answer book gave all incorrect answers to one particular exercise, and of course, my incorrect answers matched those in the teacher's answer book perfectly. Rumbled!

[Verbal]

Had a fight once. That was it, really. Far too busy getting bullied and having the social skills of a mute to do anything else remotely interesting. Then I got to college and realised that 99% of people who went to Harper Green are wankers and therefore weren't worth wasting breath on anymore.

[Dwight Schrute]

Kicked out of nursery for pushing the childminder down a flight of stairs when I was 3.
Kicked out of cubs for being too rowdy when playing British Bulldog and breaking someone's arm.
Kicked out of Sunday School for telling the vicar that I thought religion was all bollocks for the mentally weak.
Suspended from school for letting off a detonator cap in someone's ear and temporarily deafening them.
Suspended from school for flicking an elastic band in someone's eye that temporarily blinded them.

General fighting, being naughty and cheeky etc.

Oh and on a school trip to Martin Mere I had to hold the teacher's hand throughout because I pinched a Lion Bar from the on-site tuck shop thing.

Had the bobbies round at one point because I got into making prank phone calls and asked an ambulance to come to school

[Annoyed Grunt]

Caned - Once
Suspended - Once
Pushed someones head through a window - Once

Not that bad all things considered.

[CrazyHorse]

I never really got into any trouble because I'm such a girly swat.

[Sponge]

Kicked out of nursery for pushing the childminder down a flight of stairs when I was 3.
Kicked out of cubs for being too rowdy when playing British Bulldog and breaking someone's arm.
Kicked out of Sunday School for telling the vicar that I thought religion was all bollocks for the mentally weak.
Suspended from school for letting off a detonator cap in someone's ear and temporarily deafening them.
Suspended from school for flicking an elastic band in someone's eye that temporarily blinded them.

General fighting, being naughty and cheeky etc.

Oh and on a school trip to Martin Mere I had to hold the teacher's hand throughout because I pinched a Lion Bar from the on-site tuck shop thing.

Had the bobbies round at one point because I got into making prank phone calls and asked an ambulance to come to school

Nice boy, then. Prank calls were always a good one; I remember once ordering 25 Dominos pizzas to the school office.

[Lord Kangana]

I got caught several times doing things like smoking and drinking on school premises and such like.

However, we had one particuar chemistry teacher who seemingly wanted to tempt one of us into expulsion for conducting experiments with:

A) Our own lager (for which a group of us spent the double lesson behind the back bench drinking our six packs "yes mum, he really did say bring plenty")

B) Petrol, for which I actually was threatened with expulsion when I set fire to the bench and set the fire alarms off. Well you do when you're a kid, just to see, don't you?

I also got done when away with the school scouts once. I had the ill luck to pick the weekend when the headmaster decided to turn up. We were meant to pick a 30 mile route, map it and walk it, camping overnight. We caught a bus into the local town and headed straight to the pub. One of our group (luckily) being one of those lads who looks well more than 15. We were seen and suitably grilled upon our return, as our return bus pulled up alongside the coach with everyone else (scout leaders, other scouts, school headmaster) on. Rumbled. Bastards.

[Bijou Bob]

Aged 13 whilst walking to school one January, we noticed that the hill leading from a side road onto the main road was full of ice. We also knew that at 8.50 precisely, Big Jim Hilton the metalwork teacher drove down said hill in his Renault 16. Cue several buckets of water from one lads house nearby and a lot of sliding around until 8.49, then we stood back to watch Big Jim approach the junction at speed, brake, panic spreading across his face as he realised he wasn't going to stop.

His Renault was very kindly stopped by the garden wall opposite with a vaery loud bang and lots of steam, but I didn't see much of that as I was too busy hiding my face and running like hell for the school gates.

[davroduk]

Was on "weekly Report" every year at Hayward.
You had to hand it in every lesson and the teacher would grade you.
To get off report you had to get something silly like 10 A marks in a week.
I didnt get 10 in four years, so I used to say every Monday that the dog had eaten my report.
Every Monday got sent to the headmasters office for the cane. (you get used to it after a while)
Also got my front tooth knocked out by a teacher with the board duster, and ended up being caned for it as well.
HAPPY DAYS !!!!!!!!

[The Axman]

In 6th Form I got into deepest shit when an April Fool prank went too well. We'd dreamt up the idea that we'd all do a bunk, the entire 6th Form on April Fool's Day, but when somebody asked what we'd do all day out of school somebody else had the idea that we could have a competition to see how far we could get from the school. To make it fair nobody was supposed to have any money with them (but a few cheated).
Of course on the day itself a few swats and teacher's pets etc turned up for school but most of us gathered at the school gates and then dispersed as far away as we could get. Well obviously the staff realised something was amiss and put two and two together with the date and just waited for April 2nd to roll around and normality to kick back in. Only it didn't, as a group of four of us had a wildly successful go at hitching and were down in London before dinnertime. Competitiveness took over and we then split up into two groups of two.
Meanwhile overnight some parents were getting jittery as teenagers went AWOL, and crisis hit the school when six of us failed to turn up the next morning. Two were found by police wandering around on roads around Foxhouses completely lost. One turned up after getting a lift back from London. Another handed himself in at a police station in London and was 'escorted' back, but two of us had broken for the continent (it turned out we were the only two to have really taken the game seriously and had set out with our passports. My goal was Paris). We split up at Paris and I made my way to Munich. I finally asked for assistance in the consulate and was 'repatriated' back to Britain after a week away. I got an ear full from the authorities, my parents and the school. They considered suspending me but didn't - I got my A-levels and went on to university.
I didn't win, by the way, Sam my fellow truant got all the way to Morocco where he was robbed and lost his passport. He had to make his way to Ceuta and fall on the mercy of the Spanish authorities who got him back to Britain. He too stayed on, got his A levels, but died in a motorbike accident about a week before starting uni.

[Dwight Schrute]

[thebish]

Kicked out of nursery for pushing the childminder down a flight of stairs when I was 3.
Kicked out of cubs for being too rowdy when playing British Bulldog and breaking someone's arm.
Kicked out of Sunday School for telling the vicar that I thought religion was all bollocks for the mentally weak.
Suspended from school for letting off a detonator cap in someone's ear and temporarily deafening them.
Suspended from school for flicking an elastic band in someone's eye that temporarily blinded them.

General fighting, being naughty and cheeky etc.

Oh and on a school trip to Martin Mere I had to hold the teacher's hand throughout because I pinched a Lion Bar from the on-site tuck shop thing.

Had the bobbies round at one point because I got into making prank phone calls and asked an ambulance to come to school

gosh! you must have been so cool!

[Annoyed Grunt]

In 6th Form I got into deepest shit when an April Fool prank went too well. We'd dreamt up the idea that we'd all do a bunk, the entire 6th Form on April Fool's Day, but when somebody asked what we'd do all day out of school somebody else had the idea that we could have a competition to see how far we could get from the school. To make it fair nobody was supposed to have any money with them (but a few cheated).
Of course on the day itself a few swats and teacher's pets etc turned up for school but most of us gathered at the school gates and then dispersed as far away as we could get. Well obviously the staff realised something was amiss and put two and two together with the date and just waited for April 2nd to roll around and normality to kick back in. Only it didn't, as a group of four of us had a wildly successful go at hitching and were down in London before dinnertime. Competitiveness took over and we then split up into two groups of two.
Meanwhile overnight some parents were getting jittery as teenagers went AWOL, and crisis hit the school when six of us failed to turn up the next morning. Two were found by police wandering around on roads around Foxhouses completely lost. One turned up after getting a lift back from London. Another handed himself in at a police station in London and was 'escorted' back, but two of us had broken for the continent (it turned out we were the only two to have really taken the game seriously and had set out with our passports. My goal was Paris). We split up at Paris and I made my way to Munich. I finally asked for assistance in the consulate and was 'repatriated' back to Britain after a week away. I got an ear full from the authorities, my parents and the school. They considered suspending me but didn't - I got my A-levels and went on to university.
I didn't win, by the way, Sam my fellow truant got all the way to Morocco where he was robbed and lost his passport. He had to make his way to Ceuta and fall on the mercy of the Spanish authorities who got him back to Britain. He too stayed on, got his A levels, but died in a motorbike accident about a week before starting uni.

*cough* bullshit *cough*

[jaffka]

fight, fight, fight etc

[Annoyed Grunt]

fight, fight, fight etc

Quiet you!

[The Axman]

In 6th Form I got into deepest shit when an April Fool prank went too well. We'd dreamt up the idea that we'd all do a bunk, the entire 6th Form on April Fool's Day, but when somebody asked what we'd do all day out of school somebody else had the idea that we could have a competition to see how far we could get from the school. To make it fair nobody was supposed to have any money with them (but a few cheated).
Of course on the day itself a few swats and teacher's pets etc turned up for school but most of us gathered at the school gates and then dispersed as far away as we could get. Well obviously the staff realised something was amiss and put two and two together with the date and just waited for April 2nd to roll around and normality to kick back in. Only it didn't, as a group of four of us had a wildly successful go at hitching and were down in London before dinnertime. Competitiveness took over and we then split up into two groups of two.
Meanwhile overnight some parents were getting jittery as teenagers went AWOL, and crisis hit the school when six of us failed to turn up the next morning. Two were found by police wandering around on roads around Foxhouses completely lost. One turned up after getting a lift back from London. Another handed himself in at a police station in London and was 'escorted' back, but two of us had broken for the continent (it turned out we were the only two to have really taken the game seriously and had set out with our passports. My goal was Paris). We split up at Paris and I made my way to Munich. I finally asked for assistance in the consulate and was 'repatriated' back to Britain after a week away. I got an ear full from the authorities, my parents and the school. They considered suspending me but didn't - I got my A-levels and went on to university.
I didn't win, by the way, Sam my fellow truant got all the way to Morocco where he was robbed and lost his passport. He had to make his way to Ceuta and fall on the mercy of the Spanish authorities who got him back to Britain. He too stayed on, got his A levels, but died in a motorbike accident about a week before starting uni.

*cough* bullshit *cough*