West Ham are complete failures! Let's all laugh at 'em!

Zulus Thousand of em · Post by **Zulus Thousand of em** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:06 pm

I before E, except after C!

Zulus Thousand of em · Post by **Zulus Thousand of em** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:13 pm

The Knees Up Mother Brown Cockney Rentboy website has a sticky on it telling their morons, sorry members, that any of them who speculate on the identity or actually name the "sports celebrity" who is referred to in Richard Littlejohn's column in yesterday's Daily Mail will incur an immediate ban, as a High Court order has been slapped on it.

Now I don't want anyone posting a name on here, because we would presumably suffer similar similar swingeing penalties from the courts. Suffice it to say I wouldn't imagine Alan Curbishley to be on the dole for too much longer!

Here's the article. Remember - no names on here please!

Mr X, does your missus know you're here?

"Peter Shilton, Peter Shilton, does your missus know you're here?"

That was the refrain from the terraces (to the tune of Bread Of Heaven) which for months greeted the former Nottingham Forest and England goalkeeper, after he was caught in flagrante with a lady other than his wife.

They were in a state of undress in Shilton's car when they were disturbed by the woman's husband.

Shilton laughed it off, he didn't reach for his lawyers. (Actually, he did, but only to defend him on a charge of drink-driving. When the enraged husband turned up at the scene, Shilts attempted to drive off and hit a lamp-post.)

p>There was no question of him seeking to prevent the story being reported in the newspapers.

Fast-forward 25 years to another philandering sports celebrity, who has obtained a court order to protect his identity.

He, too, was caught having sex with another man's wife. And the husband decided to shame him publicly after discovering explicit e-mails.

This unidentified celebrity claimed under the "human rights" act that he was entitled to privacy and a family life, which would be wrecked if details of his affair came out - even though he was the guilty party. And he found a judge perverse enough to agree with him.

I'm not allowed to name the miscreant, even though I've seen the e-mails and his identity is fairly widely known by now. I'm sure many sports fans are aware who he is.

Wouldn't it be unfortunate if at whichever stadium the anonymous celebrity turned up at this weekend he was greeted by the crowd singing:

"Does your missus know you're here?"

Daxter · Post by **Daxter** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:20 pm

So who is it?

Zulus Thousand of em · Post by **Zulus Thousand of em** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:21 pm

cowdrill · Post by **cowdrill** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:41 pm

Dailly...can we all now, once and for all, please finally agree that he is absolute dogturd and insist that he never pulls on claret&blue again?

Soldier_Of_The_White_Army · Post by **Soldier_Of_The_White_Army** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 9:18 pm

Sorry, but at full time, I actually had beer coming out of my nostrals thinking of Pardew's earlier in the day statment about West Ham making Europe this season!!!!!!

thebish · Post by **thebish** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 9:49 pm

daxter15 wrote:So who is it?

never mind Dax - is your pah due a visit?

communistworkethic · Post by **communistworkethic** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 9:52 pm

Zulus! Thousand of 'em! wrote:I before E, except after C!

a few apostrophes wouldn't have hurt either.

Pete · Post by **Pete** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 10:00 pm

Zulus! Thousand of 'em! wrote:I before E, except after C!

What, like in SCEINCE?

communistworkethic · Post by **communistworkethic** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 10:04 pm

Pete wrote:
Zulus! Thousand of 'em! wrote:I before E, except after C!
What, like in SCEINCE?

no like in "unbelievable"

thebish · Post by **thebish** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 10:07 pm

Pete wrote:
Zulus! Thousand of 'em! wrote:I before E, except after C!
What, like in SCEINCE?

nice one!!!

beige, codeine, conscience, deify, deity, deign, eight, either, feign, feint, feisty, foreign, forfeit, freight, heifer, height, heinous, heir, heist, neighbor, neither, rein, seismic, seize, sheik, society, sovereign, surfeit, veil, vein, weight, weir, weird

it's a rubbish rule!!

cowdrill · Post by **cowdrill** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 10:09 pm

warthog · Post by **warthog** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 10:43 pm

Soldier_Of_The_White_Army wrote:Sorry, but at full time, I actually had beer coming out of my nostrals think of Pardew's earlier in the day statment about West Ham making Europe this season!!!!!!

Reminds me of Jasper Carrott's comments about Birmingham City (the side he supports)

"We'll be in Europe next year - if there's a war."

Montreal Wanderer · Post by **Montreal Wanderer** » Sat Dec 09, 2006 11:15 pm

communistworkethic wrote:
Zulus! Thousand of 'em! wrote:Interesting comment on their fanzine site KUMB, in a diatribe about their stars' fighting, coke-snorting, drinking and gambling habits(and get on there tonight and piss yourself at some of the comments, by the way!)

Any ideas on this one?

And Alan Pardew has not set a fit and proper example as manager of the club. I cannot go into any details whatsoever, though some on here will know what I'm talking about. Suffice it to say, the fish rots from the head down.

Somehow I can't see him in a sex scandal.
I can but not with a lady.

Quite right - obviously no lady.

Little Green Man · Post by **Little Green Man** » Sun Dec 10, 2006 12:12 am

Little Green Man wrote:Not sure if any one's made this point:

Just back from a Medellin Pyrex show - which I'd naively assumed was a Colombian cookware exhibition. But no, it turned out to be a manic depressive French-Canadian chanteuse. Still, Pardew's hapless bunch have cheered me up no end (once again).

cowdrill · Post by **cowdrill** » Sun Dec 10, 2006 12:54 am

ahhh the memories....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tTeKUpzuJ1k

Montreal Wanderer · Post by **Montreal Wanderer** » Sun Dec 10, 2006 1:41 am

Little Green Man wrote: Just back from a Medellin Pyrex show - which I'd naively assumed was a Colombian cookware exhibition. But no, it turned out to be a manic depressive French-Canadian chanteuse.

Never heard of her - sure you have the name right?

FaninOz · Post by **FaninOz** » Sun Dec 10, 2006 2:00 am

Back to the thread, its difficult to laugh at a team that is playing so poor, has no idea on what to do about it and appears to be made up of 11 headless chickens.

Pardew can't last much longer I fear, but who can they get in to turn it around? Dowie and Curbishly appear to be the only managers available at present, unless they want to entice Sam to the big smoke!

communistworkethic · Post by **communistworkethic** » Sun Dec 10, 2006 9:11 am

Montreal Wanderer wrote:
Little Green Man wrote: Just back from a Medellin Pyrex show - which I'd naively assumed was a Colombian cookware exhibition. But no, it turned out to be a manic depressive French-Canadian chanteuse.
Never heard of her - sure you have the name right?

http://www.madeleinepeyroux.com/flash_content/main.html

Tombwfc · Post by **Tombwfc** » Sun Dec 10, 2006 10:27 am

FaninOz wrote:Back to the thread, its difficult to laugh at a team that is playing so poor, has no idea on what to do about it and appears to be made up of 11 headless chickens.

Pardew can't last much longer I fear, but who can they get in to turn it around? Dowie and Curbishly appear to be the only managers available at present, unless they want to entice Sam to the big smoke!

I was looking through KUMB last night, and this is their wishlist.

Hiddink
Scolari
Ranieri
Curbs
Sven

Hmmmmm

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West Ham are complete failures! Let's all laugh at 'em!

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