Joke thread

If you have a life outside of BWFC, then this is the place to tell us all about your toilet habits, and those bizarre fetishes.......

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Worthy4England
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Worthy4England » Fri Jan 13, 2012 5:48 pm

Bruce Rioja wrote:Welcome to Celebrity Ready Steady Cook. So, Anthony, you had £5 to spend......... what's in your bag?

"Organic chicken, langoustines, rice, stock, wine, scallops, onions, garlic, stilton, brie, goats cheese, three bottles of Cava, a bottle of Blue Nun and I still have £2.74 left over!"
:mrgreen:
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Dujon » Sat Jan 14, 2012 1:06 am

Bruce, you owe me a new keyboard. :D
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Re: Joke thread

Post by davroduk » Thu Jan 19, 2012 11:25 am

Watching the news about the stricken cruise ship and the Sky presenter said.

"Shes lying on her side with a gash the size of a tennis court"

I just happened to glance at the wife, and now its all kicked off !!!!!!!!!
TALKING BALLS AS ALWAYS
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Re: Joke thread

Post by thebish » Thu Jan 19, 2012 12:51 pm

davroduk wrote:Watching the news about the stricken cruise ship and the Sky presenter said.

"Shes lying on her side with a gash the size of a tennis court"

I just happened to glance at the wife, and now its all kicked off !!!!!!!!!
:lol:
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Re: Joke thread

Post by thebish » Fri Jan 20, 2012 8:35 am

frankie boyle on this (probably fake) Gary Glitter twitter account...

@officialglitter Ignore the haters. Rose West is getting a similarly hard time on Mumsnet.


@OfficialGlitter Hi Gary. You deleted your reply? Glad you’ve got the hang of deleting things from the internet.
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Annoyed Grunt » Fri Jan 20, 2012 2:04 pm

davroduk wrote:Watching the news about the stricken cruise ship and the Sky presenter said.

"Shes lying on her side with a gash the size of a tennis court"

I just happened to glance at the wife, and now its all kicked off !!!!!!!!!
:lol:
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Re: Joke thread

Post by boltonboris » Fri Jan 20, 2012 3:24 pm

"So.. How's life in North Korea?"

"Can't complain"
"I've got the ball now. It's a bit worn, but I've got it"
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Worthy4England » Fri Jan 20, 2012 4:38 pm

davroduk wrote:Watching the news about the stricken cruise ship and the Sky presenter said.

"Shes lying on her side with a gash the size of a tennis court"

I just happened to glance at the wife, and now its all kicked off !!!!!!!!!
:lol:
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The Axman
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Re: Joke thread

Post by The Axman » Fri Jan 20, 2012 4:43 pm

boltonboris wrote:"So.. How's life in North Korea?"

"Can't complain"
:?
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Sponge » Fri Jan 20, 2012 6:04 pm

The Axman wrote:
boltonboris wrote:"So.. How's life in North Korea?"

"Can't complain"
:?
:conf:
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thebish
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Re: Joke thread

Post by thebish » Fri Jan 20, 2012 6:05 pm

Sponge wrote:
The Axman wrote:
boltonboris wrote:"So.. How's life in North Korea?"

"Can't complain"
:?
:conf:
are you shrugging at the joke or at Axman's reaction to the joke?
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Sponge » Fri Jan 20, 2012 6:06 pm

thebish wrote:
Sponge wrote:
The Axman wrote:
boltonboris wrote:"So.. How's life in North Korea?"

"Can't complain"
:?
:conf:
are you shrugging at the joke or at Axman's reaction to the joke?

the joke. am i going to be embarrassed for not getting this one?
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Sponge
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Sponge » Fri Jan 20, 2012 6:07 pm

I get it!
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Sponge » Fri Jan 20, 2012 6:08 pm

(i am now shrugging at Axman's reaction.)
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thebish
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Re: Joke thread

Post by thebish » Fri Jan 20, 2012 6:12 pm

Sponge wrote:(i am now shrugging at Axman's reaction.)
:lol:
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Re: Joke thread

Post by thebish » Mon Jan 23, 2012 9:17 am

Image
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davroduk
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Re: Joke thread

Post by davroduk » Mon Jan 23, 2012 11:28 am

I was sitting watching Match of the day Saturday night when the wife came in the lounge and said

"Fancy a quicky babe"

I said

"After the football love"

"You do realise you can record it"

So I said

"Nice one, you set up the camcorder and Ill be up when the footy finishes"
TALKING BALLS AS ALWAYS
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The Axman
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Re: Joke thread

Post by The Axman » Mon Jan 23, 2012 12:47 pm

Sponge wrote:
thebish wrote:
Sponge wrote:
The Axman wrote:
boltonboris wrote:"So.. How's life in North Korea?"

"Can't complain"
:?
:conf:
are you shrugging at the joke or at Axman's reaction to the joke?

the joke. am i going to be embarrassed for not getting this one?
Oh dear. Is that a record. 3 days before the penny drops. :oops:
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Re: Joke thread

Post by Verbal » Mon Jan 23, 2012 1:40 pm

The Axman wrote:
Sponge wrote:
thebish wrote:
Sponge wrote:
The Axman wrote:
:?
:conf:
are you shrugging at the joke or at Axman's reaction to the joke?

the joke. am i going to be embarrassed for not getting this one?
Oh dear. Is that a record. 3 days before the penny drops. :oops:
I'm not getting it either. :oops: :-| :conf:
"Young people, nowadays, imagine money is everything."

"Yes, and when they grow older they know it."
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thebish
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Re: Joke thread

Post by thebish » Mon Jan 23, 2012 1:42 pm

it's North Korea (rabid oppressive dictatorship) - can't complain!!

(not "can't complain" as in "mustn't grumble" - but "can't complain" as in "actually can't as I would get shot")

the humour is in the two different usages of "can't complain"...
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