Five Stages

Where fellow sufferers gather to share the pain, longing and unrequited transfer requests that make being a Wanderer what it is...

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Five Stages

Post by Dave Sutton's barnet » Tue May 08, 2012 4:45 pm

According to the Kubler-Ross model, there are five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Although you don't have to go through them in order (and can 'relapse'), I reckon I might already be at acceptance.

It's a common emotion among fans dealing (or faced) with relegation from the top flight that it'd be good to get out of this league, and although I'll be fervently hoping we stay up that will at least offer some succour.

We'll be going into one of Europe's most open and intriguing leagues, where you frequently can't predict if teams will go up or down. Obviously that could have negative ramifications for us but sod it, it's better than the majority of the last half-decade.

Like Puskas I'm quite enticed by some of the possible away trips. I've more or less given up paying £50 to watch us struggle but a change of division might drag me back. It's not a promise 'cos I've got other places to be (no SuperFan, me) but I can imagine trotting along to Brighton, Watford, Ipswich, Peterborough, Charlton, Palace, Millwall (or Miwwwaww as they seem to be known down here). Even places we've not been in a bit like Forest and Sheffield Wednesday.

Anything to get off this treadmill. Or is that Bargaining? Or Depression? Roll on Sunday and let's get the f*cking thing done with.

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Re: Five Stages

Post by thebish » Tue May 08, 2012 4:50 pm

Dave Sutton's barnet wrote:According to the Kubler-Ross model, there are five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Although you don't have to go through them in order (and can 'relapse'), I reckon I might already be at acceptance.

It's a common emotion among fans dealing (or faced) with relegation from the top flight that it'd be good to get out of this league, and although I'll be fervently hoping we stay up that will at least offer some succour.

We'll be going into one of Europe's most open and intriguing leagues, where you frequently can't predict if teams will go up or down. Obviously that could have negative ramifications for us but sod it, it's better than the majority of the last half-decade.

Like Puskas I'm quite enticed by some of the possible away trips. I've more or less given up paying £50 to watch us struggle but a change of division might drag me back. It's not a promise 'cos I've got other places to be (no SuperFan, me) but I can imagine trotting along to Brighton, Watford, Ipswich, Peterborough, Charlton, Palace, Millwall (or Miwwwaww as they seem to be known down here). Even places we've not been in a bit like Forest and Sheffield Wednesday.

Anything to get off this treadmill. Or is that Bargaining? Or Depression? Roll on Sunday and let's get the f*cking thing done with.
I suspect the giveaway will be in your gut-reaction on sunday afternoon...

if we win and then QPR lose - when the final whistle goes - do you yell "Get the feck in!!" and run screaming round the house/pub... or do you shake your head sadly and mutter.. "oh piss, another year in the premiership..."

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Re: Five Stages

Post by Bruce Rioja » Tue May 08, 2012 4:53 pm

Dave Sutton's barnet wrote:I reckon I might already be at acceptance.

It's a common emotion among fans dealing (or faced) with relegation from the top flight that it'd be good to get out of this league, and although I'll be fervently hoping we stay up that will at least offer some succour.

We'll be going into one of Europe's most open and intriguing leagues, where you frequently can't predict if teams will go up or down. Obviously that could have negative ramifications for us but sod it, it's better than the majority of the last half-decade.

Like Puskas I'm quite enticed by some of the possible away trips. I've more or less given up paying £50 to watch us struggle but a change of division might drag me back. It's not a promise 'cos I've got other places to be (no SuperFan, me) but I can imagine trotting along to Brighton, Watford, Ipswich, Peterborough, Charlton, Palace, Millwall (or Miwwwaww as they seem to be known down here). Even places we've not been in a bit like Forest and Sheffield Wednesday.

Anything to get off this treadmill. Or is that Bargaining? Or Depression? Roll on Sunday and let's get the f*cking thing done with.
Incredible - that's exactly where I am. I'm actually quite looking forward to some of the away trips if we go down. It'll be like meeting people you haven't seen for a while.

Like you say - let's just get it over and done with one way or t'other!
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Re: Five Stages

Post by Jez » Tue May 08, 2012 4:59 pm

most people on here seemed to go through them around norwich at home and have seemed to have accepted it ever since

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Re: Five Stages

Post by Dr Hotdog » Tue May 08, 2012 5:00 pm

I think I've been at acceptance since mid-december!

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Re: Five Stages

Post by Gary the Enfield » Tue May 08, 2012 5:01 pm

Dave Sutton's barnet wrote:According to the Kubler-Ross model, there are five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Although you don't have to go through them in order (and can 'relapse'), I reckon I might already be at acceptance.

It's a common emotion among fans dealing (or faced) with relegation from the top flight that it'd be good to get out of this league, and although I'll be fervently hoping we stay up that will at least offer some succour.

We'll be going into one of Europe's most open and intriguing leagues, where you frequently can't predict if teams will go up or down. Obviously that could have negative ramifications for us but sod it, it's better than the majority of the last half-decade.

Like Puskas I'm quite enticed by some of the possible away trips. I've more or less given up paying £50 to watch us struggle but a change of division might drag me back. It's not a promise 'cos I've got other places to be (no SuperFan, me) but I can imagine trotting along to Brighton, Watford, Ipswich, Peterborough, Charlton, Palace, Millwall (or Miwwwaww as they seem to be known down here). Even places we've not been in a bit like Forest and Sheffield Wednesday.

Anything to get off this treadmill. Or is that Bargaining? Or Depression? Roll on Sunday and let's get the f*cking thing done with.

Definitely looking forward to Charlton again.

I remember being in the crowd when McGinley scored the equaliser there in a 3-3 (1996-97)? Djorkaeff scoring his second in a 2-1 win to secure premiership status? Anelka being unveiled to the away fans.

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Re: Five Stages

Post by Dave Sutton's barnet » Tue May 08, 2012 5:01 pm

thebish wrote:I suspect the giveaway will be in your gut-reaction on sunday afternoon... if we win and then QPR lose - when the final whistle goes - do you yell "Get the feck in!!" and run screaming round the house/pub... or do you shake your head sadly and mutter.. "oh piss, another year in the premiership..."
Quite so. Likesay, I'll be craving a victory on Sunday. But I won't be hoying myself in the Thames if we go down, and I doubt I'll be very enthused about next season if not.

Mind you, then summer starts, as it always does, with hope... :D

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Re: Five Stages

Post by Lord Kangana » Tue May 08, 2012 5:08 pm

I think next season will be depressing whichever division we find ourselves. Uncle Eddie's credit card is maxed out, so if we stay up the best we can look forward to is another season of drudge and narrow survival.

And if we go down, i can see a mass exodus, without sufficient funding to give us upward momentum.

Perhaps this is acceptance, I don't know, but the future looks far from rosy.

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Re: Five Stages

Post by the-Bowtun-Warrior » Tue May 08, 2012 5:11 pm

I'm accepting bugger all.

we have one final chance on sunday. a decent chance. a fighting chance. a (depending on who you consult) realistic chance.

i'm fighting and getting behind the boys from now on this week.
I'll wake up on Monday and see where we are then.
but i for one just want us to save all this until IF it is confirmed and bloody stick together

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Re: Five Stages

Post by Puskas » Tue May 08, 2012 5:16 pm

Acceptance? Possibly.

I know that I don't want to get relegated, but that's more to do with wanting the team I support to be as successful as possible. I won't be enthused by another season in the Premier League. The summer starts with hope? Hope of what? Mid-table medicrity and a cup run? The absolute limit of what we can achieve, hardly the stuff dreams are made of. Hope that we can cling on and survive for another year? Not really something to get you excited.

Having said that, I've seen nothing this season to give me any reason to believe we have the ability, spirit or tactical nous we'll need to win at Stoke.
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Re: Five Stages

Post by thebish » Tue May 08, 2012 5:22 pm

Puskas wrote:
Having said that, I've seen nothing this season to give me any reason to believe we have the ability, spirit or tactical nous we'll need to win at Stoke.

apart from beating them 5-0! :wink:

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Re: Five Stages

Post by Dave Sutton's barnet » Tue May 08, 2012 5:22 pm

Stick together? Have you ever read this forum? You're pissing uphill there, m'friend.

I still think - yea, verily, think - that we have a good chance of winning on Sunday: Stoke have only won one game in the last 11 over the last two months, a 2-1 squeak against Hapless Wolves (who had more possession and corners and only one fewer shot on target). They're beatable. Mind you, so were West Brom, Spurs, Sunderland, Swansea...

I want us to win on Sunday. I think we can win, although I would no longer go so far as to say we should win. All I'm saying is that if we don't, I'll be sad but I won't be demolished, and I may actually look forward to next season more.

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Re: Five Stages

Post by boltonboris » Tue May 08, 2012 5:25 pm

I'm somewhere between denial and acceptance. Is that some kind of vain hope?
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Re: Five Stages

Post by Dave Sutton's barnet » Tue May 08, 2012 5:25 pm

Puskas wrote:The summer starts with hope? Hope of what? Mid-table medicrity and a cup run? The absolute limit of what we can achieve, hardly the stuff dreams are made of. Hope that we can cling on and survive for another year? Not really something to get you excited.
In our case, in this division, yes: hope of finishing up the table, playing good football, and hopefully continuing the trend of decent cup runs. I detest the uncompetitiveness of the Premier League and am aware that it blunts our ambition. I know that if we go down, the aim/hope/dream might be the title. Fancy that.

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Re: Five Stages

Post by BWFC_Insane » Tue May 08, 2012 5:36 pm

Acceptance with a good dose of anger sprinkled in.

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Re: Five Stages

Post by boltonboris » Tue May 08, 2012 6:14 pm

BWFC_Insane wrote:Acceptance with a good dose of anger sprinkled in.
I'd never have guessed!! ;-)
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Re: Five Stages

Post by Porrohman » Tue May 08, 2012 6:33 pm

I couldn't give a feck so long as I see another birthday.
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Re: Five Stages

Post by TANGODANCER » Tue May 08, 2012 6:51 pm

I'll stand the ridicule on Sunday. WE'RE STAYING UP :oyea: :oyea: :oyea: :oyea: :oyea:
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Re: Five Stages

Post by Wandering Willy » Tue May 08, 2012 6:52 pm

Well said. I'll be stood beside you.
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Re: Five Stages

Post by Armchair Wanderer » Tue May 08, 2012 7:04 pm

I've been in acceptance for a while, before Spurs I think. If we do stay put I'll be elated but if we go down I won't be depressed. Forward planning!

It's more realistically optimistic to accept the current situation and look for achievable targets next season than it is to lump all your eggs in the Stoke Away basket.
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