It's all Owen Coyle's fault........

[Dr.Karl]

So I've just come back from watching Total Recall and as the title credits rolled my mate turned to me and said,

"Directed By Owen Coyle".

Got a big hearty laugh from me. Got me thinking, what else do we blame him for?

Keep it light everyone, we all need a good laugh.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Has he been drawing any cartoons recently?

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Designer watches valued at £500,000 have been stolen from a department store in Manchester.
CCTV footage shows three masked men wearing high visibility jackets bursting into Selfridges just before closing on Wednesday.
The gang - their faces hidden by black balaclavas - smashed open display cabinets using an axe and crowbars and stole approximately 100 watches before escaping in a black Mercedes Benz driven by Owen Coyle.

[Gary the Enfield]

Global warming. Coyle.

[Dr.Karl]

Designer watches valued at £500,000 have been stolen from a department store in Manchester.
CCTV footage shows three masked men wearing high visibility jackets bursting into Selfridges just before closing on Wednesday.
The gang - their faces hidden by black balaclavas - smashed open display cabinets using an axe and crowbars and stole approximately 100 watches before escaping in a black Mercedes Benz driven by Owen Coyle.

[Gary the Enfield]

Designer watches valued at £500,000 have been stolen from a department store in Manchester.
CCTV footage shows three masked men wearing high visibility jackets bursting into Selfridges just before closing on Wednesday.
The gang - their faces hidden by black balaclavas - smashed open display cabinets using an axe and crowbars and stole approximately 100 watches before escaping in a black Mercedes Benz driven by Owen Coyle.

Fail. Where's the shorts bonny lad? Jesus, Coyle can't even get THAT right.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Inaccuracies and misplaced towns and cities in Apple's new map software have provoked anger from users.
In June Owen Coyle announced he would stop using Google Maps in favour of his own system, created using data from navigation specialist TomTom.
Coyle is yet to comment on the complaints about the software, which comes already installed on the new iPhone.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Just received an email

As part of an ongoing programme to improve the service we deliver to you, we will be moving the server hosting your reseller to a new location within our Bolton datacentre. This will result in downtime for your server whilst Owen Coyle physically moves the machine.

This downtime will occcur sometime between 21/09/2012 and 25/12/2013 and should last no longer than 15 weeks.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Demonstrators who gathered outside the British embassy in Islamabad to protest against Owen Coyle have begun to disperse peacefully.
The Pakistani authorities had earlier called on the army as police struggled to contain the crowd of thousands with tear gas and live rounds.
Some protesters had said they would not leave the diplomatic enclave until Coyle had been fired.
.

[bobo the clown]

Designer watches valued at £500,000 have been stolen from a department store in Manchester.
CCTV footage shows three masked men wearing high visibility jackets bursting into Selfridges just before closing on Wednesday.
The gang - their faces hidden by black balaclavas - smashed open display cabinets using an axe and crowbars and stole approximately 100 watches before escaping in a black Mercedes Benz driven by Owen Coyle.

Fail. Where's the shorts bonny lad? Jesus, Coyle can't even get THAT right.

... AND you've missed the 'L' from the title.

[Bruce Rioja]

Residents are baffled after council contractors painted a stretch of double yellow lines - just 21 inches long.

Motorists will be fined £50 or £70 if they park on the lines in Canterbury, Kent, which aren't even big enough to park a skateboard.

Locals say they cannot understand why their council has painted in the "ridiculous" lines.

Nearby homeowner Charlotte Sparrow, 26, said: "I can't believe the council would bother to paint yellow lines that short and then warn drivers that they face fines over for parking over something you can hardly see.

"It's petty rules and regulations gone mad."

But Canterbury City Council, which painted the lines, said they are crucial for separating different parking areas.

Owen Coyle, council street enforcement manager, said: "These terrific lines are in a small gap that separates the 20-minute restrictions and residents' pay and display parking bays. Such is the narrowness of the parking margins here at Canterbury City and Metropolitan District.

"If a team parks the bus over the yellow lines, the driver could incur one of two debatable penalties."

Asked which word he'd use to best describe unpaid fines, Coyle replied "Outstanding".

[Verbal]

I heard it was Coyle's decision to remove Google Maps from iOS6

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-19659736" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

http://theamazingios6maps.tumblr.com/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[Wandering Willy]

Very good Bruce.

[Annoyed Grunt]

I heard it was Coyle's decision to remove Google Maps from iOS6

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-19659736" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

http://theamazingios6maps.tumblr.com/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[BWFC_Insane]

Residents are baffled after council contractors painted a stretch of double yellow lines - just 21 inches long.

Motorists will be fined £50 or £70 if they park on the lines in Canterbury, Kent, which aren't even big enough to park a skateboard.

Locals say they cannot understand why their council has painted in the "ridiculous" lines.

Nearby homeowner Charlotte Sparrow, 26, said: "I can't believe the council would bother to paint yellow lines that short and then warn drivers that they face fines over for parking over something you can hardly see.

"It's petty rules and regulations gone mad."

But Canterbury City Council, which painted the lines, said they are crucial for separating different parking areas.

Owen Coyle, council street enforcement manager, said: "These terrific lines are in a small gap that separates the 20-minute restrictions and residents' pay and display parking bays. Such is the narrowness of the parking margins here at Canterbury City and Metropolitan District.

"If a team parks the bus over the yellow lines, the driver could incur one of two debatable penalties."

Asked which word he'd use to best describe unpaid fines, Coyle replied "Outstanding".

The good thing with those parking charges is that at least you never get 3 points............












On your licence!

[BWFC_Insane]

Residents are baffled after council contractors painted a stretch of double yellow lines - just 21 inches long.

Motorists will be fined £50 or £70 if they park on the lines in Canterbury, Kent, which aren't even big enough to park a skateboard.

Locals say they cannot understand why their council has painted in the "ridiculous" lines.

Nearby homeowner Charlotte Sparrow, 26, said: "I can't believe the council would bother to paint yellow lines that short and then warn drivers that they face fines over for parking over something you can hardly see.

"It's petty rules and regulations gone mad."

But Canterbury City Council, which painted the lines, said they are crucial for separating different parking areas.

Owen Coyle, council street enforcement manager, said: "These terrific lines are in a small gap that separates the 20-minute restrictions and residents' pay and display parking bays. Such is the narrowness of the parking margins here at Canterbury City and Metropolitan District.

"If a team parks the bus over the yellow lines, the driver could incur one of two debatable penalties."

Asked which word he'd use to best describe unpaid fines, Coyle replied "Outstanding".

The good thing with those parking charges is that at least you never get 3 points............












On your licence!

[TANGODANCER]

Jesus marriage document a fake claim experts.

A supposed 2000 year old papyrus stating that Jesus married has been stated a fake and an attempt by a forger to claim a local man had ancestry with a biblical preacher. The document, found in an un-returned library book in Horwich indicates that the marriage took place under the direction of O.Coyle. This is believed to be an attempt by forgers to discredit Bolton manager Owen Coyle who is also being blamed for nuclear fall-out, a crop failure in Ireland and a gas leak in Darcy Lever. Professor A. Grunt of Breighmet University says the papyrus is an obvious fake because the paper is the same as that in his bathroom. Bishop Thebish believes it might be genuine but Bruce Riocha points out that the groom was already deceased by then. Manager Owen Coyle was unavailable for comment as he was on a scouting trip in the Outer Hebrides.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

A GROOM on his stag do almost lost his wedding tackle — after a pal shot him in a very tender spot during a paintball battle.
Dan Littlejohn’s crown jewels swelled to the size of his HEAD.
They were so heavy from internal bleeding he feared they would fall off and worried medics carried out four hours of emergency surgery.
A month later he could barely waddle down the aisle to marry bride Gemma Matthews.
Mechanic Dan said: “I walked like John Wayne on my wedding day.
“And you can imagine what it was like on my wedding night. I just couldn’t move, let alone consummate the marriage.”
The agonising accident happened as he and pals played at the Delta Force paintball centre in Crawley, West Sussex, last month.
He recalled: “All 19 men on my stag do fired at me and Owen bloody Coyle hit me in the groin. My testicles swelled up massively.
“It was excruciating. Later I was rolling on the bed in agony. It felt like they were going to drop off.

[Dave Sutton's barnet]

Asked which word he'd use to best describe unpaid fines, Coyle replied "Outstanding".

Rest of it's good, but that's superb.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Asked which word he'd use to best describe unpaid fines, Coyle replied "Outstanding".

Rest of it's good, but that's superb.

I missed that first time round.