Today I'm angry about.....

[Lord Kangana]

*"At least 70% hand picked apples".

Need I add anything further?

[Bruce Rioja]

*"At least 70% hand picked apples".

Need I add anything further?

Batteur de femme?

[Montreal Wanderer]

*"At least 70% hand picked apples".

Need I add anything further?

You do if you want me to have a clue what you are on about. However, perhaps you don't so no worries.

[Lord Kangana]

I would have thought the sheer futility of having 70% of the apples handpicked would be fairly self explanatory. Surely?

That and the cider aspect.

[Montreal Wanderer]

I would have thought the sheer futility of having 70% of the apples handpicked would be fairly self explanatory. Surely?

That and the cider aspect.

This then is an advertizing slogan for cider?

[Lord Kangana]

Yes and no. They say made with handpicked apples. The asterix then appears at the bottom of the screen to denote that it is in fact roughly 70% handpicked apples.

Think about that for a second.

[boltonboris]

Maybe they've got Abu Hamza grabbing the other 30%

[Lost Leopard Spot]

*"At least 70% hand picked apples".

Need I add anything further?

That's maybe because 30% of it ain't apples.

[Bruce Rioja]

B fecking T have me sat here with my face drawn back in a snarling rictus of fury, the half a job bastards

[clapton is god]

^ This is 'the angry thread' not the 'rictus of fury thread'.

[Lord Kangana]

I don't even know what a rictus is.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

B fecking T have me sat here with my face drawn back in a snarling rictus of fury, the half a job bastards

I've had a few moments with B feckin T myself in the last few months.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

I don't even know what a rictus is.

It's a type of fruit mainly used as an additive in cider.

[Lord Kangana]

It deserves fury then.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Sproglet's about to be sprung. I wouldn't mind if we got an announcement and that'd be it, but oh no, I can guarantee mountains of tedious drivel in print and on screen. The News will not be worth watching for at least a week until they've got it out of their system. And yes, the irony of me commentating on the commentators and therefore adding to pile of dross is not lost on me.

[mrkint]

I'm looking forward to the crowning.

[clapton is god]

^ I see what you did there!

[Bruce Rioja]

Still sat here waiting for the B fecking T engineer to come back and finish what he was meant to do this morning - I've now been sat here for longer than The Aussies were in to bat.

[Bijou Bob]

People who use "Init" at the end of a sentence. I sat on a train from Manchester this afternoon listening to a Mancunian family of Golightlies use it every time one of them opened their wobble chops. Frankly, pub lic flogging would be too good for them.

Also included in my 'Crimes that warrant public flogging' list for today:

Anyone who uses a faux accent - Tim Westwood for example - although he deserves flogging for a multitude of reasons

Anyone exposing their underwear - I include both those who walk round with jeans around their knees and the immense fatties who insist on publically displaying their thongs whilst weighing over 20 stones.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand breathe........................

[thebish]

Anyone exposing their underwear - I include both those who walk round with jeans around their knees and the immense fatties who insist on publically displaying their thongs whilst weighing over 20 stones.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand breathe........................

hmmmm..... is it everyone with the thongs or just the immense fatties?