General Chit Chat

[thebish]

I have just single-handedly removed and cut up ALL of the carpets from a large detached four-bedroomed house - including staircase, hall and landing - and driven it all down to the dump.

I'm pooped...

they were mank!

I bet the owner's feckin' livid!.................

oh aye - but we turfed the whole house and put some sheep in it - he saw the funny side eventually...

[Gooner Girl]

Here you go...

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healt ... ntist.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

I bet childbirths a doddle too.

Research can prove anything

I had a C-Section so didn't get to experience labour itself, not that that was exactly a barrel of laughs, however some of those videos going round facebook/youtube that show men experiencing a similar thing to labour with electrodes on their stomach are entertaining viewing

[thebish]

I read somewhere that something like 70-80% of GP time is taken up by women... which doesn't really support the theory that men are the hypochondriacs that women so often (tiresomely) claim..

[Dujon]

Playing devil's advocate, thebish: Men don't bother doctors unless they are ill, nor do they present themselves for mammograms or pap smears or pregnancy tests or ultra-sound photos or . . . whatever.

An example: I wear hearing aids due to suffering from 'industrial deafness'. A few days ago the soft plastic-like bit that you shove into your lug-hole came adrift and lodged itself down the canal. A careful bit of probing with my little finger only shoved it in farther. So I asked my wife to try to retrieve the darned thing using tweezers. No go, and the escapee was closing in on the hammer and anvil (no, not the pub). Now, whilst I just might be wrong, I figure that a woman would have been beating on the door of the nearest doctor within minutes. Tell me if I'm wrong, ladies.

No, I'm a MAN and am expected to behave like one. So I did. I popped a new plastic-like bit on the now vacant end of the sound tube and carried on as normal. Then I prevaricated for a couple of days (that's man talk for planning, plotting and scheming, ladies). Having no wish to waste my own time or that of a doctor I came up with a cunning stunt. I invented a medical device which I have named the Oticextractor. I have not as yet checked with the Patent Office but this could make me millions and at the same time much anguish for mothers the world over.

My prototype was unsuccessful but promising, even though by now a drum was in danger of losing its snares. The second was successful and will form the basis for the production model. Not only was it successful - it is suitable for operation by the patient. It's the E.N.&T. version of the endoscope with control handed to the poor suffering sod with the problem. Brilliant! Until I've got the patent thingywhatsit sorted out I cannot give you full details. I can though tell you that it consists of a piece of hooked wire (about the same diameter as a paper clip) and carefully sculpted. There is a twist in the tail that I cannot divulge for the time being.

Ladies, please, we are MEN and intend to remain such. We are inventive and stoic. MEN get influenza whereas ladies do not, just as ladies get pregnant and MEN, thankfully, do not. MEN as a whole are usually decent cooks if they put their mind to it whilst ladies are exceptionally good at washing and drying the dishes, making beds and sweeping floors. We MEN look after ladies. We protect you, provide for you and generally care for you; some of us even love you.

We are MEN, influenza or not. It's been going on for thousands of years, ladies, it's about time you got used to us.

[thebish]

Playing devil's advocate, thebish: Men don't bother doctors unless they are ill, nor do they present themselves for mammograms or pap smears or pregnancy tests or ultra-sound photos or . . . whatever.

indeed not - not sure how that's devils's advocate! men don't go to the GP unless they are actually ill! GPs don't do the mammograms and ultrasounds over here!

[jimbo]

Off for a cycle up honister today to watch mark cavendish and co come through. Brutally windy up here!

[Prufrock]

Playing devil's advocate, thebish: Men don't bother doctors unless they are ill, nor do they present themselves for mammograms or pap smears or pregnancy tests or ultra-sound photos or . . . whatever.

indeed not - not sure how that's devils's advocate! men don't go to the GP unless they are actually ill! GPs don't do the mammograms and ultrasounds over here!

Indeed. The girl always uses Dujon's argument ("""""""women's problems """"""""). So, if you don't count all the times they go to the doctor's, it turns out they don't go very often! Who knew?

[Gooner Girl]

Playing devil's advocate, thebish: Men don't bother doctors unless they are ill, nor do they present themselves for mammograms or pap smears or pregnancy tests or ultra-sound photos or . . . whatever.

indeed not - not sure how that's devils's advocate! men don't go to the GP unless they are actually ill! GPs don't do the mammograms and ultrasounds over here!

Indeed. The girl always uses Dujon's argument ("""""""women's problems """"""""). So, if you don't count all the times they go to the doctor's, it turns out they don't go very often! Who knew?

Yet men generally die far earlier then women. Perhaps if you went to the doctors more often when you were poorly this would not be the case.

[Abdoulaye's Twin]

Playing devil's advocate, thebish: Men don't bother doctors unless they are ill, nor do they present themselves for mammograms or pap smears or pregnancy tests or ultra-sound photos or . . . whatever.

indeed not - not sure how that's devils's advocate! men don't go to the GP unless they are actually ill! GPs don't do the mammograms and ultrasounds over here!

Indeed. The girl always uses Dujon's argument ("""""""women's problems """"""""). So, if you don't count all the times they go to the doctor's, it turns out they don't go very often! Who knew?

Yet men generally die far earlier then women. Perhaps if you went to the doctors more often when you were poorly this would not be the case.

Wear and tear. If we were sat around chatting over herbal tea half the day we'd more likely last a bit longer. As it is, quality is more important than quantity

[Gooner Girl]

Playing devil's advocate, thebish: Men don't bother doctors unless they are ill, nor do they present themselves for mammograms or pap smears or pregnancy tests or ultra-sound photos or . . . whatever.

indeed not - not sure how that's devils's advocate! men don't go to the GP unless they are actually ill! GPs don't do the mammograms and ultrasounds over here!

Indeed. The girl always uses Dujon's argument ("""""""women's problems """"""""). So, if you don't count all the times they go to the doctor's, it turns out they don't go very often! Who knew?

Yet men generally die far earlier then women. Perhaps if you went to the doctors more often when you were poorly this would not be the case.

Wear and tear. If we were sat around chatting over herbal tea half the day we'd more likely last a bit longer. As it is, quality is more important than quantity

C'mon, facts are you're just not as tough as us women. I've never drunk herbal tea in my life.

[thebish]

Playing devil's advocate, thebish: Men don't bother doctors unless they are ill, nor do they present themselves for mammograms or pap smears or pregnancy tests or ultra-sound photos or . . . whatever.

indeed not - not sure how that's devils's advocate! men don't go to the GP unless they are actually ill! GPs don't do the mammograms and ultrasounds over here!

Indeed. The girl always uses Dujon's argument ("""""""women's problems """"""""). So, if you don't count all the times they go to the doctor's, it turns out they don't go very often! Who knew?

Yet men generally die far earlier then women. Perhaps if you went to the doctors more often when you were poorly this would not be the case.

that's cos wimmins work and being a "home maker" and having babies and looking after kids is clearly nowhere near as much of a job as wimmin make out!

anyway - 'tis all just rampant modern sexism - this constant nonsense about "manflu" and men being more whiney than women when they are ill... certainly doesn't hold true in my experience...

[Gooner Girl]

Playing devil's advocate, thebish: Men don't bother doctors unless they are ill, nor do they present themselves for mammograms or pap smears or pregnancy tests or ultra-sound photos or . . . whatever.

indeed not - not sure how that's devils's advocate! men don't go to the GP unless they are actually ill! GPs don't do the mammograms and ultrasounds over here!

Indeed. The girl always uses Dujon's argument ("""""""women's problems """"""""). So, if you don't count all the times they go to the doctor's, it turns out they don't go very often! Who knew?

Yet men generally die far earlier then women. Perhaps if you went to the doctors more often when you were poorly this would not be the case.

that's cos wimmins work and being a "home maker" and having babies and looking after kids is clearly nowhere near as much of a job as wimmin make out!

anyway - 'tis all just rampant modern sexism - this constant nonsense about "manflu" and men being more whiney than women when they are ill... certainly doesn't hold true in my experience...

Because sitting at your desk on TW all day and standing up to do a sermon once a week is hard, arduous manual labour? I'd wager my job is far more energetic then yours. You are the rampant sexist! Don't see many men these days still living in caves and charging out to fight or catch dinner with their bare hands.

[thebish]

still waiting to see any actual evidence for your claim that men are more whiney than women when it comes to being ill... is there any?

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Don't see many men these days still living in caves and charging out to fight or catch dinner with their bare hands.

You should live up here. On my way home from work in my car, I'm constantly running over men charging out of caves trying to club me to death for their dinner.

[Abdoulaye's Twin]

C'mon, facts are you're just not as tough as us women. I've never drunk herbal tea in my life.

Well. I only have to look around to see that approximately 70% of women are either shopping, or sitting in Starbucks drinking coffee/tea/herbal tea. Alternatively they are getting their nails/hair/botox done, or chatting on their phone whilst watching their maid look after the kids, fetch the herbal tea and do the housework. Meanwhile, the blokes are working 12 hour days to fund the herbal tea and shopping...

[Prufrock]

In a brief interlude of seriousness, GG is right that we don't go to the doctor's enough, and many men die of diseases they needn't accordingly, but surely that's pretty strong evidence against us being whiney b*stards!

[TANGODANCER]

Who the fxxx is Joey Essex? And is it significant that the B N's front page article's is by a Crime Reporter?

http://www.theboltonnews.co.uk/news/106 ... ts_Bolton/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Who the fxxx is Joey Essex? And is it significant that the B N's front page article's is by a Crime Reporter?

http://www.theboltonnews.co.uk/news/106 ... ts_Bolton/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Don't know. Probably. In that order.

[bobo the clown]

Who the fxxx is Joey Essex? And is it significant that the B N's front page article's is by a Crime Reporter? http://www.theboltonnews.co.uk/news/106 ... ts_Bolton/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Don't know. Probably. In that order.

Oh, good grief ......

Karol Crapnell, from Darwen, was drafted in to be the driver for her 23- year-old daughter Jenny Crapnell, as she was too excited to get behind the wheel herself.

I can honestly say I have never watched even 1 second of TOWIE.

[Lost Leopard Spot]

Who the fxxx is Joey Essex? And is it significant that the B N's front page article's is by a Crime Reporter? http://www.theboltonnews.co.uk/news/106 ... ts_Bolton/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Don't know. Probably. In that order.

Oh, good grief ......

Karol Crapnell, from Darwen, was drafted in to be the driver for her 23- year-old daughter Jenny Crapnell, as she was too excited to get behind the wheel herself.

I can honestly say I have never watched even 1 second of TOWIE.

I suppose I could google what it stands for, but I have a feeling I don't need to know. *Smug*