The Wonderful Graham Poll

warthog · Post by **warthog** » Thu Jun 22, 2006 9:55 pm

Our mate Graham has been brandishing the cards in the Australia v Croatia match.

So much so, that he lost count and gave one of the Croatia players three yellow cards.

Nice one.

Marshall · Post by **Marshall** » Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:02 pm

A cracking match to watch though, I'm gutted Croatia are out.

Bruce Rioja · Post by **Bruce Rioja** » Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:03 pm

Well The Thing from Tring aside, losing count seems to be what this game's all about. There was this uncontrollably indignant Aussie dude on the radio this morning, complaining how their taxes had funded the training of three "mungrells?" who had brought shame on their country/continent by electing to play for Croatia, completely ignoring the fact that Australia have seven Croatians playing for them and that Fatty Viduka's house on the Adriatic Coast is currently being protected by armed guards!

warthog · Post by **warthog** » Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:16 pm

Poll also missed two blatant penalties for Australia.

Is this the end for him?

One can only hope.

Little Green Man · Post by **Little Green Man** » Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:25 pm

How disappointing. I was expecting one of those vox pop have your say public vote threads.

I'd have probably gone for Graham Garden from the Goodies. Or may be Gloria Graham. Or Golden Grahams. Can someone organise this because I think the nation should speak.

Didn't see the game other than the odd highlight. Wish I had because, to be honest, the Brazil - Japan game bored pants off me. I presume Poll won't get the final now. He's probably a long way behind Markus Merk and Little Dracula in the pecking order.

warthog · Post by **warthog** » Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:32 pm

Little Green Man wrote:How disappointing. I was expecting one of those vox pop have your say public vote threads.

I'd have probably gone for Graham Garden from the Goodies. Or may be Gloria Graham. Or Golden Grahams. Can someone organise this because I think the nation should speak.

I think this has already been done. I'd put up the the url, but I can't be arsed searching.

Little Green Man · Post by **Little Green Man** » Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:39 pm

warthog wrote:
Little Green Man wrote:How disappointing. I was expecting one of those vox pop have your say public vote threads.

I'd have probably gone for Graham Garden from the Goodies. Or may be Gloria Graham. Or Golden Grahams. Can someone organise this because I think the nation should speak.
I think this has already been done. I'd put up the the url, but I can't be arsed searching.

Fair enough. To be honest, I probably wouldn't be arsed voting.

Bench · Post by **Bench** » Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:43 pm

warthog wrote:
Little Green Man wrote:How disappointing. I was expecting one of those vox pop have your say public vote threads.

I'd have probably gone for Graham Garden from the Goodies. Or may be Gloria Graham. Or Golden Grahams. Can someone organise this because I think the nation should speak.
I think this has already been done. I'd put up the the url, but I can't be arsed searching.

Thankfully, its a slow evening in Stockport......

http://www.the-wanderer.co.uk/boards/vi ... raham+poll

Little Green Man · Post by **Little Green Man** » Thu Jun 22, 2006 10:53 pm

Not as slow as it is here, I'll warrant. Still at least I'm getting paid while I'm typing this drivel.

Any road, that link doesn't say who won the poll. Should I contact the Electoral Reform Society?

hisroyalgingerness · Post by **hisroyalgingerness** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 8:41 am

i'd say yeah, easyjet for poll

Cadburys Fingers · Post by **Cadburys Fingers** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 9:15 am

Never rated this guy, he has had some absolute shockers in the Prem, and I pleased to see the rest of the world can now see he is a numpty.

As it said on Aus TV "Poll goes to pot"

hisroyalgingerness · Post by **hisroyalgingerness** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 9:46 am

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/footbal ... 108722.stm

TANGODANCER · Post by **TANGODANCER** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 11:21 am

Er, let's see now. Which comes first?

wovlad · Post by **wovlad** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 12:08 pm

Cadburys Fingers wrote:Never rated this guy, he has had some absolute shockers in the Prem, and I pleased to see the rest of the world can now see he is a numpty.

As it said on Aus TV "Poll goes to pot"

Looks a bit like forrest gump in that photo & by all accounts he ref'd like him as well

Raven · Post by **Raven** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 12:31 pm

Always likes to get on TV that bloke and get his name in the papers...done that now

Geoff Winters not too keen on him either!!

Gertie · Post by **Gertie** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 12:44 pm

Did the wonderful Graham Poll not have his Britney Spears-stylee comunicator on??

Could the 4th official not have a quite word in his lughole?? "Oi Graham you plonker you've already done that boy twice..."

Problem solved!

I was secretly hoping for the 50 times booked player to score a goal that put Croatia through just for the most total cock up.

Sorry all of Australia

warthog · Post by **warthog** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 1:19 pm

Gertie wrote:Did the wonderful Graham Poll not have his Britney Spears-stylee comunicator on??

Could the 4th official not have a quite word in his lughole?? "Oi Graham you plonker you've already done that boy twice..."

Problem solved!

Don't think it works that way. The referee has to initiate the connection. Someone correct me if I'm wrong.

hisroyalgingerness · Post by **hisroyalgingerness** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 1:36 pm

Guardian's The Fiver wrote:GRAHAM POLL'S DIARY: FRIDAY JUNE 23, 2006

7.34am
Wake from sound night's sleep when alarm rings. My, it's early. Yawn! Never mind; rising with the lark keeps the old brain sharp. Time to rise and shine. Get up off floor and clamber into bed.

7.35am
No, that's not right. Get out of bed.

7.37am
Shower and shave. Then get dressed. Shorts on: check. Shirt on: check. Whistle in pocket: check. Notebook: check. Pencil: check. Green, orange and purple cards: check, check, check. Pull on pair of socks.

7.41am
Pull on pair of socks.

7.42am
Pull on pair of socks.

7.43am
Bah! Shoes don't fit! What's going on here? Oh to hell with it. Decide to make some breakfast.

10.08am
Carve the meat. Settle down and polish off delicious morning repast of roast beef, two veg, Yorkshire pud and lashings of thick custard.

10.31am
Sit down in chair to watch TV.

10.55am
Wonder why TV is not working.

11.01am
Turn chair round to face TV. Ah that's better. But the TV's talking about me! "We had a first in the history of the World Cup," says Fifa president Sepp Blatter. "Unfortunately, when a player received three yellow cards, this is a little bit too much." None of that lip, son! You're booked! Show TV orange card.

11.03am
TV doesn't stop backchat. "We have had four officials and what is not understandable is that nobody intervened. One of them should have intervened and run on to the field and said, 'Stop, stop'." Grrrr! Show TV five more orange cards and a green.

11.04am
TV plays on regardless. "In terms of the referee, this will be analysed. I place my trust in the referees' committee. I think they have enough tact to deal with this case." Alright, son, you've made your point, but now you've gone too far. Show TV three green cards and 17 purples. Any more of this and you're off! I mean it!

11.05am
Have totally lost control of the TV. "We should not forget that Graham Poll in previous matches achieved fantastic things. Of course, we cannot excuse it but we should understand it."

11.07am
Help! Living room descends into anarchy. Book chair, sofa, occasional table (four times), mirror and corner unit. Finally lose patience with TV and show green, purple and orange cards all at once to make a big brown card. An early bath for you!

11.08am
Run bath.

11.13am
Put TV in bath.

11.14am
Jump in car with square wheels. Drive to train station to catch flight home.

Crouch > Davies · Post by **Crouch > Davies** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 4:13 pm

I feel sorry for him to be quite honest. Why on Earth didn't the officials (there are 4 others) between them DO something??? That's why they are wired up!

It would be ridiculous to send him home on the basis of that match yesterday - up until then he'd pretty much been the best ref in the competition.

Mar · Post by **Mar** » Fri Jun 23, 2006 4:16 pm

I'm sure the FA take their pick of the most inept referee England has to offer before sending them off to the major competitions. I remember our last refereeing representative doing something equally as stupid.

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