Today I'm angry about.....

[Worthy4England]

Maybe you should think about having "continental" breakfast then instead of real breakfast because you're obviously not cut out for it.

I think you'll find you are completely wrong on this point.

He is cut out for it, just triangularly.

Unfortunately, more spherically than triangularly.

[thebish]

on the subject of toast - someone once bought me a little plastic stamp for my toast. You press it against the bread - pop the bread in the toaster - and hey presto! MIRACLE - the virgin Mary in my toast....

[Prufrock]

You could make a killing in America!

[Puskas]

Our Lady Of The Toast - marvellous. Possibly a miracle.

I always wanted one of those pens which has an image of the Virgin in it, but, when you tip it upside down, her dress falls off.

I believe you can get them at Lourdes. Although last time I was there, the only images of her for sale were ones of her opening the batting against Terry Alderman.

Probably with St John at the other end - he wood be, though.

It's a bit confusing here.

[thebish]

two things..

1. those fecking irritating R5 "sports relief" adverts with the fecking irritating kids telling us we are "mile ready" - feck off already!

2. the cold weather - froze my nadgers off in the snow today doing a burial of an old woman who nobody had a good word to say about and whose relatives (all two of them) were only there out of some distantly remembered idea of "duty" - and parked their car next to the cemetery chapel with a huge dog in it that barked and howled right outside the window for the whole service - then they drove the car to the graveside - all of 50yards (the rest of us walked) so it could bark and howl all the way throught the burial too.... (do your local vicar a favour - if it is winter and you die - leave instructions to be cremated - it's a whole lot warmer!)

[thebish]

people who shove free newspapers half-way through your letter boxes so that while you're out - the letterbox is jammed open and a freezing howling gale blows around the house...

[as]

Takeaway menu's constantly being shoved through your door. To quote Sean Lock 'it's like someone elbowing you in the side, asking if you want a pizza every 2 minutes'

Them kids next door, who start screaming at 5am every morning, and their dad for being a poor parent by screaming back.

Come Dine With Me, everyone watches it, but I only like the voiceover bloke, who the f**k wants to watch people having 'dinner parties' anyway?

Tottenham and Birmingham for losing last night, the set of c***s.

Alex Ferguson's face, last night he was interviewed on SSN and he's so purple that I thought the telly had broken.

Lads who organise nights out and always invite their birds, and then choose to go home at midnight, boring f******s.

That 21yr old stunner in the next office, for being a bad flirt and me knowing I've no chance without a huge wallet.

[thebish]

That 21yr old stunner in the next office, for being a bad flirt and me knowing I've no chance without a huge wallet.

you only have a tiny (errr) "wallet" then "as"?

[Lennon'sEleven]

My own idiocy.

I had a job interview yesterday, which I felt went very well indeed.

I was in for an hour and a half, answered the quesiotns in a very confident and informed manner, and even threw in a touch of humour to show my 'fun' side. I was also wearing a brand-spanking-new suit, and looked as dapper as could be.

"Splendid", I thought, as I left the offices of what could become my future employees.

I got home, told my girlfriend I was very pleased with how it had gone.

I took of my coat, and she collapsed in a heap of laughter.

The shop where I bought my suit from had not removed the security tag from under the arm of my jacket.

I could not see it - not even in a mirror.

I have not yet received a call offering me the job.

[as]

That 21yr old stunner in the next office, for being a bad flirt and me knowing I've no chance without a huge wallet.

you only have a tiny (errr) "wallet" then "as"?

Aye - just the wallet.

She'd be walking like John Wayne if I had my way......

[bobo the clown]

My own idiocy.

I had a job interview yesterday, which I felt went very well indeed.

I was in for an hour and a half, answered the quesiotns in a very confident and informed manner, and even threw in a touch of humour to show my 'fun' side. I was also wearing a brand-spanking-new suit, and looked as dapper as could be.

"Splendid", I thought, as I left the offices of what could become my future employees.

I got home, told my girlfriend I was very pleased with how it had gone.

I took of my coat, and she collapsed in a heap of laughter.

The shop where I bought my suit from had not removed the security tag from under the arm of my jacket.

I could not see it - not even in a mirror.

I have not yet received a call offering me the job.

Now ... as someone who's interviewed far too many people for my own good, I can assure you the "new suit", even with price tag still attached, isn't an issue. Really, really it's not. In fact, it's something they can have a laugh at & it'll remind them of you.

So, I can assure you .... that's no problem.



The SECURITY TAG now. That's quite another matter.

Don't have even a twinge of scouse in your accent, do you ???

[Lennon'sEleven]

My own idiocy.

I had a job interview yesterday, which I felt went very well indeed.

I was in for an hour and a half, answered the quesiotns in a very confident and informed manner, and even threw in a touch of humour to show my 'fun' side. I was also wearing a brand-spanking-new suit, and looked as dapper as could be.

"Splendid", I thought, as I left the offices of what could become my future employees.

I got home, told my girlfriend I was very pleased with how it had gone.

I took of my coat, and she collapsed in a heap of laughter.

The shop where I bought my suit from had not removed the security tag from under the arm of my jacket.

I could not see it - not even in a mirror.

I have not yet received a call offering me the job.

Now ... as someone who's interviewed far too many people for my own good, I can assure you the "new suit", even with price tag still attached, isn't an issue. Really, really it's not. In fact, it's something they can have a laugh at & it'll remind them of you.

So, I can assure you .... that's no problem.



The SECURITY TAG now. That's quite another matter.

Don't have even a twinge of scouse in your accent, do you ???

Nope. But I don't pronounce words like 'bath' and 'castle' as if they have an 'R' in them, which would probably be enough to set alarm bells ringing in this neck of the woods.

I'm hopeful it wasn't spotted at all. He was very blunt in his line of questionning, and I get the impression he would have jumped on that as a means of testing my ability to deal with tricky situations!

[Abdoulaye's Twin]

My own idiocy.

I had a job interview yesterday, which I felt went very well indeed.

I was in for an hour and a half, answered the quesiotns in a very confident and informed manner, and even threw in a touch of humour to show my 'fun' side. I was also wearing a brand-spanking-new suit, and looked as dapper as could be.

"Splendid", I thought, as I left the offices of what could become my future employees.

I got home, told my girlfriend I was very pleased with how it had gone.

I took of my coat, and she collapsed in a heap of laughter.

The shop where I bought my suit from had not removed the security tag from under the arm of my jacket.

I could not see it - not even in a mirror.

I have not yet received a call offering me the job.

Now ... as someone who's interviewed far too many people for my own good, I can assure you the "new suit", even with price tag still attached, isn't an issue. Really, really it's not. In fact, it's something they can have a laugh at & it'll remind them of you.

So, I can assure you .... that's no problem.



The SECURITY TAG now. That's quite another matter.

Don't have even a twinge of scouse in your accent, do you ???

Nope. But I don't pronounce words like 'bath' and 'castle' as if they have an 'R' in them, which would probably be enough to set alarm bells ringing in this neck of the woods.

I'm hopeful it wasn't spotted at all. He was very blunt in his line of questionning, and I get the impression he would have jumped on that as a means of testing my ability to deal with tricky situations!

Wasn't me I don't think...I've been interviewing over the last few weeks, don't recall a security tag though

If it were me, feck off, the job isn't yours

[Lennon'sEleven]

My own idiocy.

I had a job interview yesterday, which I felt went very well indeed.

I was in for an hour and a half, answered the quesiotns in a very confident and informed manner, and even threw in a touch of humour to show my 'fun' side. I was also wearing a brand-spanking-new suit, and looked as dapper as could be.

"Splendid", I thought, as I left the offices of what could become my future employees.

I got home, told my girlfriend I was very pleased with how it had gone.

I took of my coat, and she collapsed in a heap of laughter.

The shop where I bought my suit from had not removed the security tag from under the arm of my jacket.

I could not see it - not even in a mirror.

I have not yet received a call offering me the job.

Now ... as someone who's interviewed far too many people for my own good, I can assure you the "new suit", even with price tag still attached, isn't an issue. Really, really it's not. In fact, it's something they can have a laugh at & it'll remind them of you.

So, I can assure you .... that's no problem.



The SECURITY TAG now. That's quite another matter.

Don't have even a twinge of scouse in your accent, do you ???

Nope. But I don't pronounce words like 'bath' and 'castle' as if they have an 'R' in them, which would probably be enough to set alarm bells ringing in this neck of the woods.

I'm hopeful it wasn't spotted at all. He was very blunt in his line of questionning, and I get the impression he would have jumped on that as a means of testing my ability to deal with tricky situations!

Wasn't me I don't think...I've been interviewing over the last few weeks, don't recall a security tag though

If it were me, feck off, the job isn't yours

Hmmmm.... I guess you'll nver know if it was or it wasn't.

Although Owen Coyle did slip into the interview at one point, so that could be a dead giveaway.

It would more likely have been Dave Sutton's Barnet on the panel, since it's the same company he works for - although not FourFourTwom, so I', hopeful I may be ok revealing my mistake on here!

No phonecall as of yet, though.

[Hoboh]

ORANGE

[Abdoulaye's Twin]

ORANGE

People, the company or the colour?

[Puskas]

stuff.

Doesn't stuff make yous sick?

There's either too much of it, or not enough.

Often simulatenously.

Let's get rid of stuff - the world would be a better place.

[William the White]

ORANGE

People, the company or the colour?

The fruit - too difficult for hobo to peel on his own...

[Prufrock]

B*llox adverts. I've just been informed that 'now is the time to pump up the volume in my hair'. Is it? Do I get a say? Surely I have to be given notice? Right now? But I'm busy. And what does that mean? I like my hair quiet. Oh but never mind here comes some made up science, moisturisng agents and chemical formulae, but it's been scientifically proven*










*4 out of 6 bored housewives, when asked if their hair looked better with this shampoo than without replied 'yeah probably, can I have my chips now?'

[Puskas]

Pump up the volume - MARRS. Woo.

I'm having an 80s flashback.