Today I'm angry about.....
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- Bruce Rioja
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Plenty thanks, and, as a result of that I've now given up after 15 minutes. Wankers.thebish wrote:have you nothing worthwhile to do?Bruce Rioja wrote:10 minutes now.Lord Kangana wrote:You'll get through to ticketmaster in a minute. Then you'll really be angry!
All I want to know is if I can pay on the door on Saturday, and if not, can they send me a ticket.
May the bridges I burn light your way
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I loathe automated phone waiting systems. The 'press 1, 2 or 3' options then lead you to another '1,2 or 3' option and then another, followed by the 950 hour wait. And don't get me started on the voice activated ones, where you have to read out your personal information to a machine to get a response, and look like a complete idiothole whilst doing so.
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I'm sure somebody told me once that you just pres the # key about twenty times and it will put you through to an operator (the system gets confused or something). No idea if its right, never tried it, just always tell them I'll be billing them for the price of the call, or want it taking off the next bill.
You can judge the whole world on the sparkle that you think it lacks.
Yes, you can stare into the abyss, but it's staring right back.
Yes, you can stare into the abyss, but it's staring right back.
have you ever tried imitating one when the do answer?ratbert wrote:I loathe automated phone waiting systems. The 'press 1, 2 or 3' options then lead you to another '1,2 or 3' option and then another, followed by the 950 hour wait. And don't get me started on the voice activated ones, where you have to read out your personal information to a machine to get a response, and look like a complete idiothole whilst doing so.
here's how it goes...
waiting system.... (music, reminders about how valuable you are as a customer, apologies for keeping you waiting but they will be with you soon, suggestions that you go to their shite website as if you hadn't already thought of that but discovered it was shite and didn't answer your question.... etc....
an hour later...
Hello - you're through to Tracey - can I help you?
Ratty: press 1 for yes please I'd like to buy a ticket; press 2 for you've got to be kidding I hope you all rot in hell; press 3 for Tracey, I love you, but can you hold on a while while I pop upstairs for a crap - I'll be back in ten minutes, 15 tops - ok, maybe 20, but I do love you...
yeah - there are plenty of places where repeatedly pressing the wrong key puts you straight through... (often it's a special desk marked "morons who can't work a phone", though, and it is staffed by a complete idiot on a secondary school work experience week...)Lord Kangana wrote:I'm sure somebody told me once that you just pres the # key about twenty times and it will put you through to an operator (the system gets confused or something). No idea if its right, never tried it, just always tell them I'll be billing them for the price of the call, or want it taking off the next bill.
seriously,
there is the beginnings of a UK list of shortcuts here:
http://www.ivrhacks.com/ (click the country menu for UK of course!) - mostly banks and utilities..
there's another list here: http://gethuman.com/numbers/uk
How did you know about me and Tracey? Don't tell the wife!thebish wrote:have you ever tried imitating one when the do answer?ratbert wrote:I loathe automated phone waiting systems. The 'press 1, 2 or 3' options then lead you to another '1,2 or 3' option and then another, followed by the 950 hour wait. And don't get me started on the voice activated ones, where you have to read out your personal information to a machine to get a response, and look like a complete idiothole whilst doing so.
here's how it goes...
waiting system.... (music, reminders about how valuable you are as a customer, apologies for keeping you waiting but they will be with you soon, suggestions that you go to their shite website as if you hadn't already thought of that but discovered it was shite and didn't answer your question.... etc....
an hour later...
Hello - you're through to Tracey - can I help you?
Ratty: press 1 for yes please I'd like to buy a ticket; press 2 for you've got to be kidding I hope you all rot in hell; press 3 for Tracey, I love you, but can you hold on a while while I pop upstairs for a crap - I'll be back in ten minutes, 15 tops - ok, maybe 20, but I do love you...
- Dujon
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Please forgive me for being serious on this subject.
Whatever you do, don't take it out on the person to whom you finally speak as it's not their problem and it's highly unlikely that they had any input at all to the design and implementation of the system. They are usually merely the pointy end - the bit you experience - and thus the poor cannon fodder, expected by many organisations to absorb without complaint the abuse tossed at them by customers and managers alike. It can be a thankless job.
Yes, mine is the voice of experience. I was once the "Customer Service Manager" of a local bank's credit card department. I had 69 people on my staff, about 40% of them manning the telephones. All these 'telephonists' were female. Apart from the inevitable collision of personality all of them were good eggs and did their best to do their jobs properly. In other words there wasn't a slacker amongst them. You wouldn't credit the foul language and threats tossed at them by our esteemed customers. It was disgusting. There wouldn't have been a week go by without a couple of staff bumbling into my office with tears streaming down their cheeks and another sorry tale to relate. It used to cause me ever so much anguish as I, a commander of a willing army, was shackled by the stupidity of my "superiors".
Returning to my original comment, please don't vent your spleen upon the poor lass or lad who answers your inquiry. Pretty please?
Whatever you do, don't take it out on the person to whom you finally speak as it's not their problem and it's highly unlikely that they had any input at all to the design and implementation of the system. They are usually merely the pointy end - the bit you experience - and thus the poor cannon fodder, expected by many organisations to absorb without complaint the abuse tossed at them by customers and managers alike. It can be a thankless job.
Yes, mine is the voice of experience. I was once the "Customer Service Manager" of a local bank's credit card department. I had 69 people on my staff, about 40% of them manning the telephones. All these 'telephonists' were female. Apart from the inevitable collision of personality all of them were good eggs and did their best to do their jobs properly. In other words there wasn't a slacker amongst them. You wouldn't credit the foul language and threats tossed at them by our esteemed customers. It was disgusting. There wouldn't have been a week go by without a couple of staff bumbling into my office with tears streaming down their cheeks and another sorry tale to relate. It used to cause me ever so much anguish as I, a commander of a willing army, was shackled by the stupidity of my "superiors".
Returning to my original comment, please don't vent your spleen upon the poor lass or lad who answers your inquiry. Pretty please?
- TANGODANCER
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- Location: Between the Bible, Regency and the Rubaiyat and forever trying to light penny candles from stars.
Agree Dujon it's easy for the wrong parties to cop the aggro that's really meant for the instigators of the nonesense methods. I found myself getting really irritated at an IT guy from Virgin on the telephone before I realised he was totally unable to do more than he did. The annoying thing was, when I paid a visit to the local Virgin shop and gave them an earwigging the guy just picked up the phone and in 5 seconds got a local service department who sorted the problem pronto. Why can't we just have the same number instead of being put on hold by somebody in a call centre India or somewhere and going through all the button pushing and time-wasting?
Si Deus pro nobis, quis contra nos?
Raven wrote:Bloody tractors on the roads during rush hour!
Spreading fecking mud on the roads too, brush your wheels off you lazy dirty basts
There are some big works going on alongside the A12 heading for chelmsford at the moment...
I drove past the other day - it involves HUGE trucks driving through thick clay and coming out plastered in it - BUT - before they rejoin the road - they all drive through the mother of all truck-wheel-wash machines - which looks like two niagra falls tipped on their sides and pointed at each other - the carriageway is spotless...
a bigger version of this...

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- Immortal
- Posts: 15355
- Joined: Sun Nov 18, 2007 11:42 pm
- Location: Vagantes numquam erramus
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- Posts: 15355
- Joined: Sun Nov 18, 2007 11:42 pm
- Location: Vagantes numquam erramus
They approached the cuts as a simple arithmetical problem. So am I. I bet the hire charges for that machine are about the same as getting four blokes with hoses and brushes to stand and wash the tyres.
You can judge the whole world on the sparkle that you think it lacks.
Yes, you can stare into the abyss, but it's staring right back.
Yes, you can stare into the abyss, but it's staring right back.
Lord Kangana wrote:They approached the cuts as a simple arithmetical problem. So am I. I bet the hire charges for that machine are about the same as getting four blokes with hoses and brushes to stand and wash the tyres.
ahhh... did they ever employ four blokes with brushes to do that?
maybe you've hit upon something...
instead of using one driver in a huge lorry - they could employ 100 men with wheelbarrows?
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