What are you watching tonight?

[bwfcdan94]

The cricket will be what I am watching this evening, I have enough caffeine based drinks to keep me up till Middlesbrough away never mind Watford.

[thebish]

The cricket will be what I am watching this evening, I have enough caffeine based drinks to keep me up till Middlesbrough away never mind Watford.

why would you wanna put yourself through that?? save yourself some pain - get yourself dragged naked up a gravel path instead!

[bwfcdan94]

The cricket will be what I am watching this evening, I have enough caffeine based drinks to keep me up till Middlesbrough away never mind Watford.

why would you wanna put yourself through that?? save yourself some pain - get yourself dragged naked up a gravel path instead!

Does that mean something or am I meant to take it literally.

[thebish]

I'd like to explain it to you more simply - but I can't find my crayons!

[bwfcdan94]

Basically the cricket is going to be awful.

[a1]

There's no point calling Frankie Boyle and ugly ginger missing third Proclaimer cause he doesn't care.

seems to 'care' when you call him a pisscan ..

must touch a nerve or summat .

[Gooner Girl]

Iirc Adlington got some stick for her appearance from Frankie Boyle on twitter. I imagine that would have lowered her self esteem some what.

He's nasty. Yet she is the one with the Olympic gold medals and he is a loser. She has every reason to feel better about herself then he does. Doesn't work that way though, does it...

she has many reasons to feel good about herself - so why doesn't she? (genuine question)

Because whatever her achievements she's still defined by some by the way she looks. People know that's the way to hurt someone so they go for it.

There's no point calling Frankie Boyle and ugly ginger missing third Proclaimer cause he doesn't care.

indeed... but that only scratches the surface... given her achievements - why does Adlington care what a model on I'm a celebrity looks like - or what some ginger tosspot says about her who makes a name for himself by being offensive?

the answer is - of course - (i suppose) - personality type... My missus is VERY conscious of what others think of her and will take almost anything personally if it is possible.... I (on the other hand) fall off the scale on the other end and tend to assume that if someone has a problem with how I look or what i do it is because they are somehow mentally deficient..

this might sound sexist - but I think women are more likely to have a similar personality type to my missus than men are (in very broad brush general terms) - which is why I am constantly surprised at how cruel and nasty and judgemental women ARE to each other...

who are the cruellest and most damaging and cutting hurtful people to girls in the playground at at secondary school? other girls - hands down... they learn it early...

I think GtE puts it pretty well. Ultimately most women do care an awful lot more then men about how they look and it does hurt when you feel you are inadequate that way. Even if like Rebecca Adlington you are clearly extremely talented at other stuff.

I take things pretty personally too, perhaps that is a girl thing, but have not really experienced the cruel, nasty bitchiness from other women Bish says is commonplace. Possibly because growing up I was a tomboy who would prefer to be playing football or climbing trees then doing my nails or chatting up boys so I wasn't seen as any kind of threat. I know girls can be nasty to each other, but again, not all girls are! I grew up with a lovely group of friends in school and whilst we had our girly fallings out I don't remember too many cruel comments.

[thebish]

I think GtE puts it pretty well. Ultimately most women do care an awful lot more then men about how they look and it does hurt when you feel you are inadequate that way.

what I am asking is why? and how do you decide that you are inadequate - presumably by comparing yourself with other women...

[Bruce Rioja]

Yes, farting, burping and being good at computer games ARE vital life skills and key if you're going to attract a mate.

Grown men that play computer games do so because they can't down a pint in under five seconds, the bunch of tossers.

These may be the truest words ever spoken (well, typed) on the internet

5 seconds is quite a high threshold though, don't you think?

Bruce may be out of practice. Or talking about Perry.

I often feel benevolent on Friday afternoons, chaps.

[Gooner Girl]

I think GtE puts it pretty well. Ultimately most women do care an awful lot more then men about how they look and it does hurt when you feel you are inadequate that way.

what I am asking is why? and how do you decide that you are inadequate - presumably by comparing yourself with other women...

I don't know why (or even if) women do care more about their looks then men, but how do you decide you are inadequate? Partly by comparing yourself to other women as you suggest, but I would suspect there are many more complex reasons women feel that way too.

A few for example:

1. Low self esteem - possibly caused by poor parenting. Parents that weren't interested in you/didn't value you as a child when young so you grew up feeling you weren't good enough in any way.

2. Bad experiences with men in the past - particularly in your teens, maybe cheated on or rejected by a bloke in favour of your best friend could lead to someone doubting they were attractive. Unrequited love in your teens is extremely painful and can have a huge knock on effect, I do know that.

3. An off the cuff comment from anyone - male or female, parent, teacher, friend, words that hurt and scar for life, that you don't forget. Eg "You've put on a bit of weight" said by kindly meaning grandma could potentially lead to anorexia in extreme cases.

4. Huge media pressure to look a certain way and the fact that kids have social networking these days, snapchat and Askfm are not things I would want my teenager on.

IMHO anyway. Am hardly a worlds expert in womankind but probably have more of a clue then you blokes

[thebish]

you are right it is complex - but i don't see how any and all of your four reasons would apply only to women and not men too - making them equally neurotic about their looks... but somehow, men emerge differently from it all...

we're off up to my son's graduation on monday - my missus is visibly and actually distraught that he doesn't think he needs a haircut.. why is this?? it's not even here hair... it's because she subconsciously thinks that she will be judged by other women by how her son looks in the photographs in years to come... neither he (crucially) nor I think it is even remotely an issue... (for how this turned out - see the happy thread!)

[Gooner Girl]

you are right it is complex - but i don't see how any and all of your four reasons would apply only to women and not men too - making them equally neurotic about their looks... but somehow, men emerge differently from it all...

Because society in general doesn't put as big an emphasis on men's looks as they do women's. There's still something rooted subconsciously in many peoples minds that says men should do the hard work and women should sit around and look pretty?

[thebish]

you are right it is complex - but i don't see how any and all of your four reasons would apply only to women and not men too - making them equally neurotic about their looks... but somehow, men emerge differently from it all...

Because society in general doesn't put as big an emphasis on men's looks as they do women's. There's still something rooted subconsciously in many peoples minds that says men should do the hard work and women should sit around and look pretty?

yes - that's true - what I don't get is why women buy into it and do it to each other...

[Gooner Girl]

you are right it is complex - but i don't see how any and all of your four reasons would apply only to women and not men too - making them equally neurotic about their looks... but somehow, men emerge differently from it all...

Because society in general doesn't put as big an emphasis on men's looks as they do women's. There's still something rooted subconsciously in many peoples minds that says men should do the hard work and women should sit around and look pretty?

yes - that's true - what I don't get is why women buy into it and do it to each other...

I don't think they all do, you just must know lots of horrible, catty women! Am sure men play 'games' of subtle one-upmanship in different ways.

[Bruce Rioja]

I agree.

[thebish]

you are right it is complex - but i don't see how any and all of your four reasons would apply only to women and not men too - making them equally neurotic about their looks... but somehow, men emerge differently from it all...

Because society in general doesn't put as big an emphasis on men's looks as they do women's. There's still something rooted subconsciously in many peoples minds that says men should do the hard work and women should sit around and look pretty?

yes - that's true - what I don't get is why women buy into it and do it to each other...

I don't think they all do, you just must know lots of horrible, catty women! Am sure men play 'games' of subtle one-upmanship in different ways.

as a teacher you must have noticed how vicious and cruel girls are to each other??? girls attack each other psychologically and with words and taunts rather than physically (generally speaking) - they do this from a fairly early age - and that kind of stuff is often harder to get over as you grow up - self-esteem damage is more lasting than a kick in the shins (usually) - and it perpetuates itself... boys arguments and fights generally are over a lot quicker than girls are...

unfortunately (though I hope you don't) you will find that as she grows up - Jessie will be more deeply hurt by what girls do and say to her than by boys...

[mrkint]

Peep show

An absolute bag of shite designed for people who think they're clever

[Gooner Girl]

Then Amy started walking round in a turquoise bikini and flibbidy wah wah fnrrrt fnrrt wobdiddly.

Hope you enjoyed tonight's white bikini in the shower moment GtE...

[Gooner Girl]

as a teacher you must have noticed how vicious and cruel girls are to each other??? girls attack each other psychologically and with words and taunts rather than physically (generally speaking) - they do this from a fairly early age - and that kind of stuff is often harder to get over as you grow up - self-esteem damage is more lasting than a kick in the shins (usually) - and it perpetuates itself... boys arguments and fights generally are over a lot quicker than girls are...

unfortunately (though I hope you don't) you will find that as she grows up - Jessie will be more deeply hurt by what girls do and say to her than by boys...

Silly girly arguments about who's who's friend - yes, dealt with plenty, but in my 10 years of teaching reception to year 8 not really come across taunts about each other's looks though I suspect that does change as they get older. Probably totally different at secondary level.

There will come a time when Jessie discovers boys as a teenager where I suspect she will care more about what boys think of her then girls. Or at least a certain boy. Gulp. Can't think about that yet.

[CAPSLOCK]

Its all about jugs for birds